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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » an old middle school crush. what to do?

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Author Topic: an old middle school crush. what to do?
Member # 36052

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i just found a boy i had a crush on when i was in 8th grade. i just recently graduated from high school and finding him felt so... warm. i guess. i can never remember feeling for somebody as much as i felt for him. maybe because my feelings have matured but i liked him for so long. i promised myself i wouldnt ever feel that way again. i havent seen him since the beginning of my 9th grade year but even going into 10th grade, i had a hard time getting over that crush. i would still think about him when i liked other people. he was my "dream" guy. i didnt get over it until i began liking another boy almost equally as much but i still thought about him from time to time. now since i found him on a social networking site, my attraction to him in still there and i haven't been able to get him off of my mind. i use to write about him, talk about him constantly, dream about him and then he moved... and i use to cry about it. i never got a chance to tell him how i felt but i knew he knew through other people. we were mere associates; i talked to him when it was a group around, or atleast another person but when it was just us two he would become very shy. i would often wonder if that meant that he had no interest to talk to me (there had been a lot of weird, mixed signal things going on). i was very, very shy as an early teenager and not to mention i was a late bloomer; very homely looking. now im a completely different person. i couldnt see myself pursuing a relationship with him because im a totally different person now but believe me when i tell you, i was very, very ecstatic to talk to him and for the fact that he lives in a different state and i have a boyfriend that i care deeply about but i would really like to become one of his good friends. how do i do that? i talked to him online but he didnt really open up much. he told me he wasnt a huge talker and i dont think he remembered much about me since he moved around so much, but i want so desperately to be his friend and when i want to be somebody's friend, i always succeed at it. what should i do? its like i almost think everything happens for a reason. from time to time i thought of a day when i would talk to him again if that doesnt sound weird lol.

[ 07-31-2008, 07:50 PM: Message edited by: intensity-in-ten-cities. ]

Posts: 13 | From: MD | Registered: Dec 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 39559

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I know whatcha mean. What I would advise is to just like flood your feelings to him but let him know you're NOT interested in dating but just to be good friends (if he gets the idea that you want to be more it could ruin the relationship with him AND your relationship with your current boyfriend.

Hey mom? Where do babies come from?

Posts: 8 | From: California | Registered: Jul 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 36052

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hmmm I just don't want to tell him that and seem like a psycho lol

its gonna be soo hard
but I really would like to be his friend.

Posts: 13 | From: MD | Registered: Dec 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Member # 25425

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If you do want to get to know him better, I'd take it slow and just tell him that you're interested in catching up with him and see if you two connect as friends. I would not tell him about the crush until you two have known each other a while longer, if at all. Too, if I was you, I'd spend some time thinking about why you are trying to get in touch and really examine your feelings on that, just to avoid any confusion further down the road.

Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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