Donate Now
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » BF is terrified of the worst-case scenario

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: BF is terrified of the worst-case scenario
mimble
Activist
Member # 35859

Icon 1 posted      Profile for mimble     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
To clarify, my bf is absolutely terrified of the slim possibility that i could get pregnant...I suppose this is great in how careful he is with protection and all...but whenever I even insinuate the idea, he gets all nervous and he's like "Oh god...I don't even want to think about it...let's not talk about it" Of course, I obviously do not want to get pregnant, but I do think we should be prepared for anything that MIGHT POSSIBLY happen. Should I press the issue on him or just leave it alone? I just feel like he should at least acknowledge the idea of pregnancy.
Posts: 56 | From: UK | Registered: Nov 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Personally, I'd be inclined not to have the kind of sex which could create pregnancy with someone that unwilling to discuss that possibility like that.

So, what I'd say were I you, is something to the tune of, "Look, I hear you're freaked out, but I;m the one who has the risk of becoming pregnant, so imagine how I must feel. That given, I need for us to talk about this, and just have a discussion about what we both think we might like to do if it did happen so that I can feel more safe in sleeping with you, and we can be sure it's a good idea for us to be sleeping together, period, particularly if we're not on the same page about it."

In other words, I agree with you: I think he should be able to have this discussion too, and I'd posit that if he just can't handle it, you're looking at a lack of readiness for this kind of sex on his part.

So, if he still won't talk about it with you, what are you thinking in terms of choices for yourself? Do you still feel comfortable having sex with someone with whom this is such an X-factor and who seems likely to completely freak out if you were to have an accidental pregnancy?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68164 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mimble
Activist
Member # 35859

Icon 1 posted      Profile for mimble     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Thanks, I will call him now...

PS I have tried to reply twice and typed up a long rambly reply and twice it told me there was some sort of error with using parentheses in html? What was that? It was rather annoying to retype my reply only to lose it again =/

Posts: 56 | From: UK | Registered: Nov 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I'm not having any problems using parentheses on the boards (here, let's double-check), so I suspect you might have been trying to put it IN code somehow?

All the same, it doesn't seem to be a problem.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68164 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3