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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Worth keeping the lie.....

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Author Topic: Worth keeping the lie.....
Member # 34152

Icon 1 posted      Profile for AlwaysSweet     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hello again....Sorry but I have another question. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost 3 years and are both virgins. We attend the same college (it was a coincidence I swear!) and he joined a fraternity and when his friends see us together and hear about our history, the automatically assume that we have had sex and do so often. (My friends know that we have not had sex.) We never corrected anyone about it because my boyfriend says that if they knew that we have not had sex yet, they would make fun of him for a LONG time or until we did.

I was just wondering if we should tell people. I mean me and my boyfriend laugh about it when the people leave the room. THe problem is my boyfriend's "brothers" ask questions about the sex that we supposedly have. They asked when we did it the first time and he made up this story about our first time. Now everytime he tells them something he has to tell me so I dont slip and countradict the first story. Do you think it is worth keeping the secret?

P.S. Am I the only one who has done this before with they boyfriend/girlfriend? Probably...

Posts: 5 | From: U.S. | Registered: Jun 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 25983

Icon 1 posted      Profile for -Lauren-     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
In my opinion, it's nobody's business what someone does with another in a relationship. That said; I personally would not think it's OK to blab about all the sexual things done/details about a partner's body without their permission, but I don't know whether telling about the things you HAVEN'T done is alright or not.

Try talking to him about how you feel and why you'd like people to know the truth. In the meantime, I've found when people get nosy, a simple "I'm sorry, but what I do with my boyfriend/girlfriend is my business and his/hers only, and I have too much respect for him/her to violate that trust." gets the job done pretty nicely, and any immature assumptions/retorts quickly die with cold indifference.

[ 06-02-2007, 10:23 PM: Message edited by: Miss Lauren ]

Posts: 4636 | From: USA/Northern Europe | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 34237

Icon 1 posted      Profile for classicjeff59     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
It is nobody's business except between you and your boyfriend.

And your boyfriend saying to you that he'd be laughed at if his friends knew you guys were virgins is a very insecure and immature thing to do and say to you. Think about it.

Posts: 2 | From: Michigan, USA | Registered: Jun 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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