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Author Topic: scared of not being good enough
cool87
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I have had a fear lately (well I have had that fear for a long time) that I might not be good enough when it comes to sex. Like my boyfriend and I will try having intercourse again soon but I'm just scared I won't be good enough, you know ? That just puts even more pressure on me to perform well and that's not really good when it comes to sex because that could be totally orgasm and pleasure inhibitory.

I mean he's had other partners before and they were not virgin, they were experienced and now he's with me and well I'm not experienced.It shouldn't really matter, I know we've been friends for quite some time and I know he's not really like someone who would break up or be mad because I'm not as good as other women when it comes to sex but I still have that fear.

I don't know. Maybe I'm overthinking this. He hasn't said anything though but I'm still concerned. So how can I overcome this thought ?

[ 05-19-2007, 08:13 PM: Message edited by: cool87 ]

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Posts: 3598 | From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LucysDiamonds
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Hon, I'm sure you've heard this said before: your boyfriend is with YOU, not some other girl, because he wants to be with you. Nobody's forcing him. And from your descriptions of him this far, he seems like a decent fellow, so as long as he's still not pressuring you to do anything you don't want to do, then I'm 100% sure that he isn't intending at all to put pressure on you. (In short, you are overthinking this. [Wink] ) But really, if you are this concerned? You could always talk to him about it. Make sure that he knows to give you feedback when you're having sex, ANY kind of sex; that way, he's helping you learn what works for him in a way that is gentle and non-intimidating. Everybody is different, so even if you WERE super-experienced, your sex styles might not mesh. It happens. But with good, open communication, you can totally get past that.

Hope this helps. [Smile]

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cool87
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Yeah. You're probably right. That's just me being too worrysome. [Smile]

Thanks !

[ 05-19-2007, 10:07 PM: Message edited by: cool87 ]

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Posts: 3598 | From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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