I have had a fear lately (well I have had that fear for a long time) that I might not be good enough when it comes to sex. Like my boyfriend and I will try having intercourse again soon but I'm just scared I won't be good enough, you know ? That just puts even more pressure on me to perform well and that's not really good when it comes to sex because that could be totally orgasm and pleasure inhibitory.
I mean he's had other partners before and they were not virgin, they were experienced and now he's with me and well I'm not experienced.It shouldn't really matter, I know we've been friends for quite some time and I know he's not really like someone who would break up or be mad because I'm not as good as other women when it comes to sex but I still have that fear.
I don't know. Maybe I'm overthinking this. He hasn't said anything though but I'm still concerned. So how can I overcome this thought ?
Hon, I'm sure you've heard this said before: your boyfriend is with YOU, not some other girl, because he wants to be with you. Nobody's forcing him. And from your descriptions of him this far, he seems like a decent fellow, so as long as he's still not pressuring you to do anything you don't want to do, then I'm 100% sure that he isn't intending at all to put pressure on you. (In short, you are overthinking this. ) But really, if you are this concerned? You could always talk to him about it. Make sure that he knows to give you feedback when you're having sex, ANY kind of sex; that way, he's helping you learn what works for him in a way that is gentle and non-intimidating. Everybody is different, so even if you WERE super-experienced, your sex styles might not mesh. It happens. But with good, open communication, you can totally get past that.
Hope this helps.
-------------------- So if you care to find me Look to the western sky As someone told me lately Everyone deserves the chance to fly Posts: 365 | From: DC | Registered: Aug 2006
| IP: Logged |
Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998
Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.