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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Self Issues

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Author Topic: Self Issues
watermongoose15
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Member # 23441

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Right now im dating a friend of mine right now and here's my situation, even though i kno she loves me and cares for me because of my previous relationships (where my gfs did not like me at all they just dated me because i liked them and they dumped me within a week) i feel like i just cant trust her (not because its her just i cant trust) like i feel that i dont believe it that sometimes i feel like she doesnt like me that much
wat do i do?

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Give Peace A Chance
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War is Over if you want it
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Posts: 60 | From: Bonita, California, United States | Registered: May 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
DarkChild717
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Trust takes time. It has to grow. It can't happen overnight. Give it time. While caution is good, overcaution can prevent you from enjoying your relationship.

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Treat with respect the power you have to form an opinion--Marcus Aurelius


Posts: 2789 | From: The Evergreen State | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
watermongoose15
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so this is more of a trust issue than a personal issue in ur opinion Dark CHild?
Posts: 60 | From: Bonita, California, United States | Registered: May 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
watermongoose15
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I mean i kno i make it seem that way in my 1st post but the way i mean it is that its not cause i dont trust HER i just dont feel safe being more open and "welcoming" because of my previous experiences
Posts: 60 | From: Bonita, California, United States | Registered: May 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
DarkChild717
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I think it's a bit of both. I was devestated when my first boyfriend broke up with me, and I was livid to find out he was a habitual liar. That relationship ended October of 2000. I didn't date again til December of 2001. It still took me three months to completely trust my new parter. Part of that was letting myself heal from the previous relationship. But part of it was my being cautious, and preventing another broken heart.

My gamble was lucky. I'm still with that man I began dating in 2001. I trust him completely.

Part of this is learning to trust yourself, and your heart. The other is allowing a friendship and a relationship to grow.

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Treat with respect the power you have to form an opinion--Marcus Aurelius


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StrawberrySafeSex
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I agree as well, it does take time to built trust within a relationship, regardless of past relationship conflicts it's hard enough to open up to someone. It is putting your heart on the line and unsurity of what may come in the future, but keep in mind that there is no way to no what will happen. If you do decide to take the plunge and put your trust and faith in this person,(who you have clearly indicated is good and does care about you a great deal) you could break up, get hurt, or hurt her, OR you could have the most meaningful relationship of a lifetime, and have all your wishes of being truly intimate and in love with someone come true.

Consider it!
Strawberry


Posts: 59 | From: Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada | Registered: Nov 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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