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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » What is better?

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Author Topic: What is better?
HellFish
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Is it better to kiss her on the first date when she doesn't want to, or not kiss her on the first date when she wants a kiss?

I have tried kissing on the first date and it has backfired more often than not, and on my last date she wanted a kiss and I didn't give it to her. Have i screwed myself over or is there a chance for redemption on the 2nd date?


Posts: 8 | From: tx | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Jill
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Whoa, there should be no kissing going on unless both parties want to. Period.

Why not talk to this girl on that second date and ask her what she wants? That will eliminate the guesswork and make things a whole lot less stressful.


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freakedout
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If you're really not sure what your date wants, ask her, or tell her what you want. Her reply is going to lead you down one path or another, and this way, if you ask her what she wants, she'll respect you more because you respected her...
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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You're making things a lot more complicated than need be.

How about this: you're on a date, and you want to kiss your date, you simply say, "I'd like to kiss you. May I?"

Easy as pie.

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson


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Agent_Smith
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Oh come on, kissing is way more fun if you don't expect it, the guess work makes it fun
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logic_grrl
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Let's try to avoid the generalizations, okay? That may be how you feel, but clearly Hellfish isn't finding the guesswork much "fun".

And there are lots of people who would not find an unexpected kiss - especially if it was also an unwanted kiss, or one that felt "too early" for them - fun at all.

Sometimes, a spot of actual verbal communication can be indispensible. Some of us even find communication sexy ...


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Gumdrop Girl
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i don't know about the rest of you all, but for me, an unwanted kiss can be met with a slap to the face. The lady doth protest!

I'd have to say it's not a bad idea to try to ready body language, but that seems to have failed HellFish, so in your case, either ask her real nicely, or give her a test peck on the cheek, or a hug.

Of the first set of questions, I'd have to se that it's better not to kiss her if she wants it, then to kiss her and have her clock you. If you pass on the kiss, you can always try again later when you're ready.

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May suffering and pestilence befall the %$@! who broke into my car.


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BruinDan
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And remember, HellFish...when kissing, try to make sure your breath doesn't smell like your name.

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BruinDan, "Number Three," FHOM

Beware the naked man who offereth you his pants.


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retarded_brat
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quote:
Originally posted by BruinDan:
And remember, HellFish...when kissing, try to make sure your breath doesn't smell like your name.


LOL!!!!. Good one. And even garlic is a bad idea...

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"I'm no good at putting myself in other people's shoes, I'm too busy getting my own to fit." - A.D. (Adam Duritz)


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bluefreak44
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If you're not sure she wants to kiss, and you're too afraid to ask her, then just put off kissing for now. What harm could taking things slow physically possibly do?

*still working on not abbreviating my "you"s and "you're"s*

[This message has been edited by bluefreak44 (edited 05-29-2003).]


Posts: 81 | From: MO, USA | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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