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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Feel kind of Funny getting on top.

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Author Topic: Feel kind of Funny getting on top.
IgottaManAlready30
Neophyte
Member # 10421

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Can anyone help me. I've been going out with my b/f for 1 year and a few months. Everytime we have sex and he wants me to take control and get on top of him I get nervous and dont want to do it. I think about it all of the time and its not like i never did it before with my ex but its just now i feel really weird. Maybe because he's older than me i feel as if i'm going to humiliate myself. Please help. It feels like I forgot how to take control now. help me please.
Posts: 3 | From: Brooklyn Ny | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 568

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the simple rule is to not do anything that makes your feel uncomfortable. If certan sexual positions make you uneasy, you are not obligated to do them. but you and your partner can experiment with methods that work for the both of you. we can't offer tips in that department because we're educational, not pornographic. So try to compromise and find something you both like. good luck.

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If the shoe fits, it's probably your size.


Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
CutiePie4eva
Activist
Member # 7052

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does you bf know you feel uncomfortable about this? if not i think you should talk to him about what makes you uncomfortable and such. i know this is easy to say, but hard to do... but for a relationship to work best for the both of you, especially one phyiscal you need to be able to communcate with him about these types of things.

if you're uncomfortable talking to him about it than you should try to have what you are going to say to him figured out beforehand... i had to do this with my exbf cause i was really uncomfortable with a certain action we were doing. it really bothered me, and i was worried to tell him because i wasnt sure how he would react to me asking him to stop asking if we could do it. i was really nervous talking about it, but i finally did. and i had been nervous about nothing. he was completely understanding, and he stopped asking to perform the certain action. i told him when i felt i was ready or when i wanted him to do it i would let him kno. we went at a pace that was good for both of us.

mayb if you just straight out told him you arent ready to be "in control" he would stop asking so much. than when you feel more comfortable or ready, you can just surprise him.

also, you sound really like your really selfconscience... even though hes older it doesnt mean that he knows everything about everything. just experiment, and even if ur knew to things he wont notice. its really hard to tell when people are new to things, unless they straight out say it. experiment with things at your own pace.

among everything, just do what you feel comfortable doing.

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dont worrie b happie... its like a law! =)

hunt for clothes NOT for animals. =)


Posts: 239 | From: new york, USA | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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