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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » i wanna die..

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Author Topic: i wanna die..
skie1100
Neophyte
Member # 1496

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i have been goin out with this guy.. we like each other, we have a mutual understanding.. but the problem is, he has a kid and a wife (that doesnt wanna be with him anymore). there's this girl we hang out with. she told me that they also have a mutual understanding.. so i asked him. and he said that wasnt true. i believe him and i trust him but not totally.. i just told him that if ever he would fall for her, im willing to let him go (but actually it kills me). what should i do..? im so confused.. and then a while ago he told me that the girl we hang out with told him that shes gonna have a bf. and asked him if hes ok. whats her purpose of telling and asking him that? and also a while ago he was with a friend, and they told me, he told me that i should look for a bf. and he told me not to worry coz he wasnt gonna look for other women. end of conversation. so what do you think is the real score?? i need some opinions.. im just so confused.. i really dont trust that chick! duh! ... help~
Posts: 14 | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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He "wasn't going to look for other women?"

HELLO! He doesn't HAVE to -- he's married!

Sugarplum, come on. There's a word for people who are in marriages that are over: divorced. Anything else means he's still in it, period. If they didn't want to be with him anymore, they wouldn't be, and he'd have the papers to prove it.

Why trust him? He's obviously not trustworthy nor does he take his comittments seriously, this potential OTHER relationship with your friend aside. Someone this creepy and crappy isn't worth your life -- he isn't even worth giving the time of day to. You dererve better: anyone does.

And any of our lives are worth more than any given relationship: that isn't all we're here for. What a waste of viscera it would be if all we existed for was to be someone elses doormat.

Get smart: pull yourself up by the bootstraps and move on.

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

"If you're a bird, be an early early bird --
But if you're a worm, sleep late." - Shel Silverstein


Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
KittenGoddess
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 1679

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Sweetie, listen to Miz S there...she's telling you the truth. This guy is obviously getting to "have his cake and eat it too". He's made a committment to someone else that he's not honoring, so what makes you think that you can trust him? You deserve a whole lot better than this guy! Seriously don't waste your time on this...move on and find somebody who is going to love you the way that you deserve to be loved.

~KittenGoddess

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"You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip."
~Jonathan Carroll


Posts: 7316 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Lin
Activist
Member # 2050

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You guys do not watch enough TV Dramas. Hon, as Miz S said, unless he shows you the divorce papers and waggles it in front of your face, there is always a chance he is not as separated from his wife and kid as you think he is.

There's no point dying over such a guy. Ask him what's going on. Does he like you or not? if he say he does, tell him to show it and settle things with his wife. But you know what, a guy willing to give up his family like that probably isn't worth much anyway.

Sorry. That's really how I feel.


Posts: 2294 | From: Singapore | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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