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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » This girl steals my friends!

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Author Topic: This girl steals my friends!
Lucky1402
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 894

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Well, I'm kinda friends with this one girl(or at least I used to be). The reason we aren't good friends anymore is basically because she thinks she's better than alot of people, we don't have much in common anymore (she's one of those people who are hard to talk to because they think they're better than everyone), and honestly I think that recently she has changed into a conceited, mean person. So I've stayed away from her. But recently she has started "stealing" my best friend (honestly, stealing) and totally ignoring me. Me and my other friends have noticed that since our friend started hanging around her she ignores us, and acts like we are the dorkiest people in the world, and we never see her anymore since they ignore us. I don't know why it makes me mad, but it does- it's like this girl is changing her into someone I don't want to hang around with (know what I mean?). It burns me up to have them ignore us like we don't even exhist. When she isn't around this girl she acts absolutely normal, like we're best friends again. What can I do (if anything) to make them understand how it feels and possibly get this girl to stop hogging her? (I know that sounds immature, but she IS "hogging" her). LOL Anyways, can anyone please give me some advice? Thanks, it would help alot.

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*^Lucky^*
"We have to pause and ask ourselves: how much clean air do we need?"~ Lee Iococca
"Dream as if you'll live forever, live as though you'll die today."
"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."


Posts: 492 | From: Michigan | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LilBlueSmurf
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Member # 1207

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Okie you're not gonna like me much for saying this but ... to me, it sounds like kindergarden fights over crayons or something.

No one can "steal" a friend from you. Maybe she's preoccupied, or exploring other options in friendships ... Maybe you're just jealous. I don't know what the problem is b/c i do'nt know you or your friends. What you need to do is sit down w/ her and tell her that you're feeling left out. You can't speak for your other friends, but you can speak for yourself!!

Communication is really important!! You have to talk to her, or how will she know what you're thinking/feeling? Just talk about how it makes you feel when she leaves you and your other friends like that ... Maybe she has a good explaination, maybe she doesn't. At least then you'll have a straight answer ... Which i can't give you right now.

Good luck hun ...

Ooohhh and this is just my personal opinion, but i do'nt think this post belongs in sex politics ... someone wanna bump it to relationships or something?

[This message has been edited by LilBlueSmurf (edited 01-10-2001).]


Posts: 7168 | From: Ontario | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Dzuunmod
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 226

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Would anyone object if I moved this topic over to relationships?
Posts: 1515 | From: Montreal, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jenn^*
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Member # 2341

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Honestly, lil blue smurf, I don't think that her problem sounds like a childish fight over crayons. Can you honestly say that you have never been in a similar situation? And Idon't think it's jealousy either, but mostly hurt. Apparently you don't know what it would feel like to have your absolute best friend in the whole world start acting mean and blow you off. I know from experience that it makes you feel like dirt- as if you aren't good enough for her and that you're going to lose your best friend. And it's perfectly normal for her and her friends to be a little angry. Wouldn't you? I agree that she should talk to her about it, but that may not always help. It's hard to handle when two of your friends decide that they only want to talk to you when they feel like it. It's perfectly fine that this friend of hers is exploring other friend options, but that is no excuse for her to be acting like shes better than Lucky or to ignore her. Honestly, I don't think Lucky deserves the pain and anger that comes with this situation. Maybe she should just avoid these girls for awhile until they cool off and decide to start acting like real friends again. And it is NOT a childish situation. Good luck, Lucky!

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Jenn^*
"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."


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Lin
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Member # 2050

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Jenn honey she did say it was her personal opinion. And I think she is entitled to that ok? there is no right or wrong answer to Lucky's question here.

Well Lucky, I think that she is just very cofused right now. It seems to me that while she wants to act "cool" and stuff with this other girl, she really wants to be your friend. You say she is stealing your friend, maybe she is lonely for some reason and needs her own friend.

But these are all guesses, why don't you have a good talk with her. If she is your gd friend, she should be receptive towards what you are saying. If she can't be bothered, then leave it. Find new friends who treat you with respect. Gd luck sweetie.


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Dzuunmod
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 226

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Yeah, I think I'll send this on over to relationships, everyone.
Posts: 1515 | From: Montreal, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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