Iíve known my girlfriend for four years now.We broke up for close to a year or something like that. When we break up we donít really talk. Weíre now going back out and itís been four months. Sheís really changed. Sheís constantly hitting things, I let her hit me she doesnít hit that hard but she also punches walls (now she canít hit me because she broke her hand). She refuses to have sex with me at certain times and sometimes sheíll agree but I feel like Iím pressuring her so we donít have sex or she'll break down and cry when i try to initiate anything. She's constantly apologizing to me, she doesn't really talk to other people, and she doesn't like to be with anyone but me. Her family doesn't know what to do either. A couple of weeks ago she took a kitchen knife and sliced her wrist. She needed stitches. She hasnít really talked to me since, I donít even know whether sheís my girlfriend or not. I donít know what happened during that year we werenít together but I just wanna help her.
Posts: 2 | From: NY | Registered: Aug 2008
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I am very sorry to hear that you're in the position you're in: this isn't easy to deal with, on any level.
Right now, your girlfriend needs more help than you alone would be able to give her. She needs to see some sort of therapist, a counselor, someone who can get her the resources she needs. Cutting, anger, severe mood swings, etc are symptoms that need professional attention.
I'd start with her family. If you feel comfortable, call them or stop by and explain what you've seen, and suggest that they try and get her into counseling. That's probably her best bet at this point.
As an aside, don't let her hit you. It's not healthy for her or you, and you don't know if that behavior will escalate to something more.
(ETA: if you tell us where specifically you are in New York, we can throw some names your way of groups or people that could help her.)
Sheís in counseling at the moment, I talked to her mom who doesnít really like me much. Her mom said sheís been seeing someone since March. She lives on Long Island. We donít really live all that close and I canít see her as often as I want to. I did try asking her mom questions but she really doesnít like me so Iím going to try asking her cousin or some other family member. She stopped talking to her family though and I guess theyíre scared of her. I wanna approach the subject but I donít want her to shut down on me, she sort of is now. We saw each other a few days ago but she really didnít talk or look at me. and thank you
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