Donate Now
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Pain during sex

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Pain during sex
downinalbion3
Neophyte
Member # 107247

Icon 9 posted      Profile for downinalbion3     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Hi, sorry if this has been answered before but I really don't understand why penetrative sex causes me pain. My boyfriend and I have been having sex for 7 months pretty regularly, we have a great relationship and sex life (kinky, loving, committed, the whole works), he makes me come via my clitoris regularly and tirelessly, I am always really relaxed and ready to have sex, we use TONS of lube and it still hurts consistently from when he enters me to when he comes. I don't know what else I can do, I've ordered a vibrator so he can stimulate me more easily during penetrative sex but I doubt that will get rid of the underlying pain. He has a big penis, I suppose, thickness and length wise however I tried solo-sex with a dildo that we know is smaller than his penis and this still caused me pain. I never thought my vagina was particularly tight and have never had problems using tampons but whenever anything penis-shaped enters me I just get a sore, stretching feeling in the shallower parts of my vagina, like the entrance, and a sharper pain if his penis goes too deep plus pain afterwards. We don't use condoms because I'm on the pill, which I know makes one 'drier' but WE USE SO MUCH LUBE.

Sorry, I realise this must be a frequent question but it's frustrating as I feel like I'm doing everything right, with no results. I don't even want to orgasm from penetration, I just want there to be no pain as I know he prefers it to oral sex, so it'd be something we'd do for him. It's getting to the point where he feels so guilty and angry at himself about it that it's starting to stress me out which isn't going to help!

Thanks, Petra

Posts: 3 | From: not saying | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Sorry you're struggling with this. [Frown]

Can I just check in first about if you have yet seen a sexual healthcare provider to rule out physical causes of the pain, like an infection or other health condition?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 67932 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
downinalbion3
Neophyte
Member # 107247

Icon 1 posted      Profile for downinalbion3     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
No I haven't actually. but planning on going to the clinic tomorrow anyway. Could an infection (like thrush or something) cause pain? Thanks
Posts: 3 | From: not saying | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
downinalbion3
Neophyte
Member # 107247

Icon 1 posted      Profile for downinalbion3     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
No I haven't actually. but planning on going to the clinic tomorrow anyway. Could an infection (like thrush or something) cause pain? Thanks
Posts: 3 | From: not saying | Registered: Apr 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yep, it can.

If you've looked at our content on pain with sex, one thing you probably noticed is that we suggest by starting with a healthcare provider: seeing one telling them what has been happening, and having them check to see if the issue is physical.

That's for a few reasons, including that if it is physical, you might need treatment or other care, and because if it is, then all the yay-sex, ton-of-lube, clitoral-stumulation in the world may not do anything if that health issues isn't taken care of first.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 67932 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3