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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Sex problems

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Author Topic: Sex problems
Ginna
Neophyte
Member # 101544

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Okay, so me and my boyfriend have tried to have sex many times, but I can say they were failures. He keeps loosing his erections during intercourse and can't ejaculate through vagunal intercourse, even with an errection. It's leaving us both frustrated. I don't know what to do? And we have tries with and with out a condom, with the same effect.
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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When you say sex, are we talking about many different kinds of sex, or just intercourse?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ginna
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Member # 101544

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Never tried anal, but he doesn't get soft from oral ( but he takes way too long to finish there too. ). If that answers your question?
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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So, what you're saying is that this is only happening with vaginal intercourse, but not with other kinds of sex?

So, first up, not everyone is going to orgasm or ejaculate from any given sexual activity, including intercourse, or do so every time (as you probably know from your own sexual response).

As well, not everyone wants or likes every sexual activity: have you two talked about if intercourse is something he's finding he even wants and enjoys? And about WHY both of you feel frustrated? In other words, why is this frustrating? What do you both need from this you're not getting? And whatever that is, are those things you can get from other sexual activities?

Lastly, since vaginal intercourse tends to be an activity that's really emotionally and socially loaded for a lot of people, especially heterosexual people, have you two had some talks about that? Have you talked about how to dial the frustration down, too? After all, it really is hard to get or stay excited when something is super-loaded, and people suspect one or both folks might wind up frustrated or annoyed.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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