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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Worried...

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Author Topic: Worried...
Member # 102586

Icon 9 posted      Profile for Uber_Jess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
So my mom scheduled my first gyno exam next week and I am worried. 4 things worry me.

The first is that I haven't been able to go poo in like a week so my doc told my mom to give me an enema. As in GIVE. This is soooo embarrassing. I mean I get that I am just 14 and haven't had an enema before. On the other hand, I'm 14 and should be able to figure it out!

Second is the worry that it will hurt. I mean I *have* had sex but my boyfriend isn't exactly huge. Don't get me wrong he does AMAZING things with his penis (and tongue. and fingers.) Anyways my point is that his five-incher is the biggest thing thats been in my vagina and I have seen pictures of those metal clampy-things. And they look BIG.

The third one may seem odd when you consider the previous worry but I am afraid I may have an orgasm from the stimulation. I have always had an extremely sensitive vagina and having an orgasm during my first gyno exam would be very embarrassing.

My last worry is that my doc will know I have had sex and will tell my mom. Then my life will be over.

Any advice would help.

Posts: 24 | From: USA | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Icon 1 posted      Profile for Karybu     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
With the enema, your mom doesn't get to dictate your medical treatment. That's something you and your doctor decide on, so I'd talk to your gyn at the beginning of the appointment about that. An enema is far from the only way to treat constipation, so you don't have to have one if it's not something your comfortable with.

Per the discomfort, often gyn exams can be a bit uncomfortable, but they're usually not painful. (Kind of like getting your teeth cleaned at the dentist, in a way - not something you'd want to do every day, but definitely not anything that's going to have you in massive amounts of pain either.) Plus, those metal clampy things - the speculum - come in different sizes, and they're really not as big as they look, honest.

Worrying about being turned on or having an orgasm during an exam isn't unusual, but it's pretty unlikely. A lot of sexual arousal happens in the brain, and lying on an exam table in a doctor's office is just about the least sexy thing I can imagine. It's sort of like the difference between getting a kiss on the cheek from your grandma or a kiss on the cheek from your boyfriend - same physical contact, but the context is way different, and that in turn affects how you respond. To boot, having someone put in a speculum or give you a bimanual exam really doesn't feel like having any kind of sex, it's more poking and prodding than anything.

Regarding your last point, even though you're 14, you have every right to ask the doctor not to share medical information with your mom. (And, if your mom wants to be in the room, you can absolutely ask that she NOT be there.) It's important to be honest with your doc about your sexual history if you can, though, because that can affect the kinds of tests they choose to do.

Have you seen our article on first gyn visits? You might find that helpful to have a read through before your appointment: Your First Gynecologist Visit

"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

Posts: 5799 | From: Canada/Australia | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 101544

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I wouldn't worry. For the constipation, you don't need your mother to do it. Try raisin bran. Or fiber.

I just went to my first gyno appointment this summer and expected the worse, but it wasn't that bad really. They just make sure your breasts don't have any lumps, and check you for clamidia and gonnoreia ( I think that's how you spell it).

Ethier way, I had not even had sex at the time and nothing hurt. It's only there hand. And they use lube do it doesn't hurt you ( just so you know , and in cause you think you messed yourself).

Last , your parents won't be in the room so you can ask your doctor not to say anything. Honestly they shouldn't anyway unless they found some type of medical problem.

Posts: 9 | From: USA | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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