Hi, Me and my boyfriend have sex daily and I'm not on birth control and he only sometimes uses condoms but he says he always ”pulls out” but I'm scared what if he doesn't pull out one day because he doesn't notice or something? And I'm so scared because I don't wanna get prego. I don't know what to do ! And when I talk to him about not having sex anymore he gets so mad at me and he watchs a lot of porn he doesn't know that I know though and it makes me feel like my body isn't good enough...
First off, I understand how you feel about being nervous. I'm usually worried about pregnancy even if I hadn't had a risk. However, though pulling out or withdrawal, in perfect use, is 96 percent effective in preventing pregnancy, it is a really good idea to use condoms in order to better prevent it. Are you interested in using birth control? Birth control methods like the ring and the pill have high effectiveness ratings and can be obtained with a prescription.
There is an article here called "The Buddy System: Backing Up Your Birth Control With A Second Method." It has listings of effectiveness ratings of one birth control method used alone and ratings for paired birth control methods (like withdrawal and condoms).
When was your risk? You could also use Emergency Contraception if you feel like that would be something you'd like to use.
I'm so sorry that you are feeling down about your body. You know, I think everyone struggles with body image at some point or another. What are the things about your body that you like? What about personality traits and what you like wearing, like jewelry and clothes? Try thinking about those things next time you feel upset.
Yes, you would need to go to your own doctor, or to a walk-in clinic.
I'm sorry, but I really don't feel well-versed enough in Emergency Contraception (EC) to explain it well. It's a form of contraception that can help prevent pregnancy if you've had a pregnanvy risk and no birth control was used or if your birth control failed (like if a condom broke, for example). I've tried to paste in an article heree about EC. If that link won't work, go to the "Repro Depo" section at the top of any page on this site and you'll see that article further down the list once you click on that.
Hi, Erika nicole. Copper's already started you out with some information; I have a bit more to add that might be helpful for you.
Copper is correct that "pulling out", or withdrawal, is an effective method of contraception when it's used properly. The really important part of that is "when it's used properly". Withdrawal isn't usually considered a reliable method of contraception because most people don't manage to do it successfully every single time. It's 73% effective in typical use: that means that if 100 women use withdrawal as their only method of contraception, over a year, we might expect 27 of them to become pregnant and 73 not to become pregnant. If you don't want to become pregnant, using withdrawal is a lot, lot better than using no contraception at all, but it's not a very reliable method. Here's some more information on withdrawal: http://www.scarleteen.com/birth_control_bingo_withdrawal
If we don't want to become pregnant, the options we have that support that wish are either 1) not engage in sexual contact that has any pregnancy risk, or 2) use one or two reliable methods of contraception. Using one reliable method of contraception makes pregnancy unlikely, and using two makes it extremely unlikely. There's some information here about the many different options for contraception, if you'd like it http://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/birth_control_bingo
We always have the right not to have sex with our partner if we don't want to, and we also have the right not to have sex if we don't feel safe from the risk of pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections. We have the right to decide that we don't feel ok, safe or happy about sex without reliable contraception. Particularly if we're the person who would be carrying a pregnancy, we have every right to take that risk seriously and be able to protect ourself from it. And usually, if we don't feel ok, safe and happy about having sex, that's an indication that we need to have a serious check-in about whether having sex, or having it in the way we've been having it, or with the person we've been having it, is something that's a positive thing for us or not.
What do You want, ideally, for yourself? Would you want to have sex if you had reliable contraception, or would you feel more comfortable not having sex right now?
You said your boyfriend gets mad at you when you talk to him about not having sex any more. Getting mad doesn't seem like a very safe or supportive reaction. It's not ok for someone to get mad when we're trying to talk about very personal things that only we have the right to decide on, like what happens to our body, including having sex. Would you like to talk about this?
-------------------- The kyriarchy usually assumes that I am the kind of woman of whom it would approve. I have a peculiar kind of fun showing it just how much I am not. Posts: 914 | From: Europe | Registered: Sep 2011
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