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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » First time, and risks.

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Author Topic: First time, and risks.
initium
Neophyte
Member # 43943

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It kind of took me by surprise, but it was a consensual act - we were checking in with each other throughout. My partner and I have engaged in genital stimulation with each other while fully clothed, and today we went a little further, with manual sex (but no vaginal entry).

So I gave him a handjob, he fondled me. Went to wash the pre-ejaculate off our hands (soap and cold water), and then went back to round two. The thing is, I'm not too sure entirely about the sequence of events - I touched him, around the glans, and showed him my clitoris, which he rubbed. I'm pretty sure there was no contact with the vulva after either of us had handled him, and he assures me that the way he remembers it we used different hands. But because I was wet his finger did slip toward the vaginal opening, and we both touched my clitoris. I can't remember if anyone had pre-ejaculate on their hands at this point in time!

AFAIK the pregnancy risk from that should be very low, but I'm needing a little reassurance wrt that [Frown] We're kind of nervous about it because we're both from sex-negative households (conservative society, sorry), and I'm four months below age of consent (he's less than a year older than I am, but legal).

That was pretty much our first open sexual experience, so I think STI risk is low; it's pregnancy I'm freaked about. FWIW, I'm on a roughly 30-day cycle; my period started six days ago and ended yesterday.

I'm really sorry to disturb anyone with this, but I'm not certain whether it's anything to fret about. Relationship-wise, we've agreed to put a hold on the sex for a bit after today. (It's always been manual and nothing else.)

Thanks in advance for any help/advice [Smile]

Posts: 35 | From: Singapore | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Onionpie
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 41699

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Hey! I can assure you, you really shouldn't be worrying about this incident. There's a really, really low risk here. To really pose a risk of pregnancy, his or your hand would have to be pretty much DRIPPING with semen! If you want more reassurance, read this article: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/reproduction/whats_the_risk_easy_pregnancy_risk_assessments

And there's a bit about manual sex here, too: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/reproduction/misconception_mayhem_separating_pregnancy_and_pregnancy_risk_myths_from_facts

Hope this helps! [Smile]

Posts: 1311 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Dec 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
initium
Neophyte
Member # 43943

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Oh my God, thank you for being so nice! [Big Grin] Afterward I was fretting quite a bit, kinda, and he was trying to calm me down with logic, but his sex ed's sketchy at best, so yeah, wasn't feeling all that calmed down.

It's still okay if there was slight vaginal penetration, right? Because afterward I remembered his finger had slipped in a little (he corrected that as soon as he realised).

I took a look that those two pages, but the situations presented didn't seem to match my own (being as they are for a more general audience and all) so that didn't really help heh... Thank you so much for bringing me back down to earth! We've been really careless about sex because we've not been expecting it to go that far (even though each time it does... sigh...), definitely going to move things back a bit bec. of lack of access to protection.

Again, thank you ever so much. <3!

Posts: 35 | From: Singapore | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
initium
Neophyte
Member # 43943

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Uh, and I'm sorry for being so paranoid, but the page in question states that

quote:
quote:
If your fingers or hands came into contact with pre-ejaculate (pre-cum) or semen (ejaculate, "cum"), either your own or your partner's, did you touch your female partner's genitals or insert your finger(s) into her vagina (or touch your own genitals/insert your finger(s) into your vagina if you are female) while there was still visibly wet pre-ejaculate or semen on your fingers or hands?
If YES, then you may have a LOW risk of pregnancy.
If it has been less than 120 hours since your risk, you may obtain emergency contraception. If it has been greater than 10 days since your risk, see your health care provider as soon as possible for a pregnancy test and an STI screening.

Is that applicable here? [Confused]
Posts: 35 | From: Singapore | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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