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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Too Wet?

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Author Topic: Too Wet?
JoeSmoe101
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Member # 39609

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Me and my gf just recently started having sex. Neither of us were virgins but we are both relatively inexperienced. The issue is that whenever we have sex I cannot seem to climax. I think that this is because she gets extemely wet and it becomes very difficult to feel anything ecspecially with a condom. Because of this I start getting worried about not climaxing and then it goes all downhill from there. I don't think that it is because she is to loose or I am too small. Because when I use my fingers she is fairly tight around two fingers which is about the same girth as my penis.

Do you have any suggestions which could help us out? Is being too wet possible?

Posts: 1 | From: San Diego | Registered: Aug 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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For a woman to have intercourse that feels good and comfortable, she really has to be lubricated. Generally, that should not pose any big problems for a couple. If it does, it's not something you'd want to try and "fix" since how wet a woman is is generally about the time in her fertility cycle and how aroused she is. Not all women get as wet as others when aroused, but obviously, we're not going to want to try and look to inhibit arousal when someone is going to be having sex.

As well, a vagina really cannot be "too loose," as vaginas don't come in static sizes: the vagina contracts around what is put inside of it, but when a woman is relaxed and aroused, it should loosen and relax some and not feel overly tight to her.

But not everyone is going to reach orgasm with intercourse alone: most women don't, and some men don't, either. I think we can say that with men who don't, it can often be men who need a sexual activity where there is more friction involved than with intercourse. No sense in not being frank: men who have thinner penises will also sometimes feel less sensation during intercourse than those with thicker ones. Some circumcised men will also often feel less sensation from intercourse than uncirc'd men. But too, know that your fingertips have a lot of sensory nerve endings which the shaft of your penis does not.

Trying different positions, angles and ways you're having intercourse makes a difference for some, while for others, orgasm from intercourse alone is just going to be infrequent or not happen at all, and if that's the case, that's fine.

So, what can you two do? You can try some different ways of having intercourse. You can incorporate more activities which DO get you there. And you can not worry about it and just have intercourse because it feels good, rather than worrying that it has to result in orgasm, for you or your partner.

Lastly, are you putting a drop or two of lube inside your condom before you put it on? That also will often increase sensation because it will allow the foreskin to move a bit on the penis much in the way a foreskin does.

[ 08-01-2008, 03:50 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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You might also find this helpful: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/im_a_guy_so_how_come_i_dont_enjoy_intercourse

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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