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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » is this wrong?

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Author Topic: is this wrong?
chelsea16
Neophyte
Member # 38628

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i am a 16 year old girl, and not sexually active, and don't plan to be until marriage. I frequently masterbate, and in a since it makes me feel disgusting that i do, but it also relieves me of sexual tension. I want to know if it's wrong to this at my age, or disgusting, because i feel as if it is.

please help me!

[ 05-27-2008, 12:57 AM: Message edited by: chelsea16 ]

Posts: 5 | From: california | Registered: May 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 36725

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There's nothing wrong with choosing to have sex - either by yourself through masturbaton or with a partner if it's something that you're ready not only physically, but emotionally and mentally as well. In fact, masturbation's been declared a normal and healthy sexual activity by the American Medical Association. The only time that it's truly bad for you is if it's something that you simply do not want to be doing.

It's a very normal thing for people your age (and indeed people both younger and older) to explore sexual feelings and responses through masturbation. Most people - men and women - masturbate. For a lot of people masturbation is the first encounter of sexual responses and a way in which one can learn what feels good and therefore when choosing to turn to partnered sex is more able to help their partner understand what feels good to them. It also helps you to understand more about your own genitals which not only helps with sex but also in health as far as being able to identify where problems may be.

It's not dirty or disgusting. It also won't cause health problems or blindness as said years and years ago. So down to a question for you - why do you feel that masturbation makes you feel disgusting? Is it religion or personal moral thoughts? Below is an article that I think will help you to gain some more information on the subject.
Is Masturbation Okay? (Yep.)

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

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chelsea16
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Member # 38628

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I'm not sure why i do. Maybe because my surrounding's i guess. I have strong morals to wait until marriage and i am for sure staying with that choice. So now that i'm aware that it IS a healthy thing, then it makes me feel less uneasy. Many of my friend refer to it as disgusting, so it made me feel that way.
Posts: 5 | From: california | Registered: May 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 36725

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You know, many people are inclined not to say that they do or ever would masturbate in public because they think they're the only one or it's somehow wrong to do so. When you take into consideration that 95% of people have or continue to masturbate, then add up the number that say they don't, these numbers don't add up.

But you have to take into consideration that often times people are not comfortable talkng about sex as it is. you'd be surprised about the number of people that say it's disgusting just so that someone else doesn't know they also do so. But rest assured, there's nothing disgusting or abnormal at all about masturbation.

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

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chelsea16
Neophyte
Member # 38628

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Thank you so much for clearing things up!
I have one question though, does the first time ALWAYS hurt for everyone?

Posts: 5 | From: california | Registered: May 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
September
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 25425

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Nope. Sex never has to hurt, not on the first time or the tenth or the fiftieth. If you are fully relaxed and aroused, using enough lube, and with a partner who's paying attention to you and listening to you, you'll be fine. Check it out:
First Intercourse 101

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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