My boyfriend of almost a year and I plan to start having sex. I'm a virgin and he has only had one only partner, his ex-girlfriend of over 2 years. I am not on the pill, I tried several & they all did not have positive effects on me both physically and emotionally, so I would like to avoid going through all that again if possible...in the future we will definitely look into it and I will explore other options...but I'm just talking about in the meantime.
Anyway, we will definitely use a condom always, and I was wondering if I could be pretty confident in the safety of just a condom without the pill or another form of BC right now. I am not worried about STDs, we have both been tested and we both trust each other, but I know the condom will take care of that anyway. We both are concerned about pregnancy...can I be confident with just a condom?
Also, would it be better if he pulled out before he came? Or would it be alright to let him come inside me as long as we had the condom?
Posts: 8 | From: United States - VA | Registered: Jul 2004
| IP: Logged |
Hi there, Although using two forms of contraception is more safe than one method, condoms can be very reliable if used correctly. Most condom failures occur because of incorrect usage, so if you use it correctly, it's less likely to not work. A Simple Condom Primer
Also, in case a condom does fail, you may want to look into how you could get emergency contraception if you need it.
PS--it's good that condoms will decrease STD transmission, but it *is* something to be worried about. STDs are a significant health risk among young women, and even though you have both been tested (which is good!), STD screening cannot detect all STDs. So it's no little matter. As for STDs as a matter of trust, you don't stop wearing a seatbelt because you trust the driver--you do it because it's to protect your safety.
To add to that, not only is withdrawal unnecessary with a condom, it actually increases the chance of condom breakage.
Here are some ideas which may help you decide whether you want to use another method of contraception as well:
Have you tried both the combined and progestin-only pills? If not you could look into that. There are many pill brands anyway, so it may be that a different brand would give you fewer side effects. Also, there are other ways of administering hormonal contraception than the pill, e.g. depo-provera (the shot), the patch and nuvaring. I think depo-provera tends to have more side effects than the pill, the patch I'm not sure about side effects, and nuvaring I think has less. It might be worth reading up on these or asking your doctor. Nuvaring is a plastic ring you insert in the vagina, so because the hormone is released directly into your reproductive tract, lower doses are required, it's effect is also simply reversed by taking it out if you do have problems, unlike depo-provera which has to wear off. the patch is also easily reversed by taking it off.
You can also increase your protection against pregnancy by combining condoms with another non-hormonal method such as the diaphragm/cap, if you can't or don't want to take the pill.
Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998
Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.