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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Not liking orgasms

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Author Topic: Not liking orgasms
Burdened with glorious booty
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Is it normal to not actually like orgasms? I've not had sex, but I've managed to achieve what I'm pretty sure is an orgasm during masturbation, and I found it more uncomfortable than good. Like, everything suddenly felt so hypersensitive that it almost hurt to keep going, and the muscle twitches I got in my legs were pretty strong, and I really didn't like it. However, I like everything leading up to that, especially the bit where I can feel an orgasm coming - I just don't like the thing itself. Is this normal? And is there anything I can do to make it a little easier on myself?

[ 04-12-2012, 06:20 PM: Message edited by: Derpy Hooves ]

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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You know, we all get to like what we like, and not like what we don't when it comes to sex and any part of sexual response.

And for sure, some people find orgasm isn't their fave part of the sexual response cycle, and some people don't always like orgasm sometimes. I'd say it's more rare to seriously dislike them all through life but a) one orgasm does not a lifetime of experiences make, and b) sometimes something about us or our life experience is rare or unusual, and that's okay. It's okay to be rare or unusual. [Smile]

Like I said, you're talking about one experience, and what it comes to exploring our sexuality, it's a learning process, so over time, we'll tend to find out more of what we like, want and what feels best. You get to experiment with all of this to find out what feels best for you, and it also probably won't feel the same with every orgasm or for all of your life.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Burdened with glorious booty
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Okay, I think I didn't elaborate on this enough - it's not just the one time. I'd say about three or four times, and each time it was like this. And it's not like it felt bad, necessarily. Just that it got so uncomfortable in the short time afterwards that, even though I'm curious as what I could do after, I can't. I mean, literally everything before the orgasm is great, but as soon as it's done I have to stop. It's just too much, and I don't really know what to do about it. Sorry I didn't clear that up - I thought I'd explained it well enough, but I guess I didn't.

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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Gotcha. I'd still say three our four is pretty close to one: again, I look at sexual experiences as something that spans a lifetime. But that doesn't mean we can't know what we do and don't like as we go, either.

You know, a lot of people feel "done" or like more genital stimulation right after orgasm is too much. So, some people just be done with it, others do other things that aren't genital, or take long breaks before more kinds of genital stimulation.

You might also experiment with how you're reaching orgasm, what you're doing while it's starting and happening and try changing things up them to see if you can't discover feelings you like better than you have so far.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Persimmon
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I don't especially like orgasms themselves either, I prefer the build-up much more.
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