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Author Topic: Please Help!!!!
Paulette
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I had a huge pregnancy scare this week. I'm on the pill (I'm sure I'm a perfect user, because in the 7 months I've been using it I've never skipped a pill and I take it always around the same time, 11.30 - 12.00, the biggest difference might have been of about an hour and a half, but not always, just sometimes). However I was feeling really really sick and had ate nothing bad(though I think this might have been too from the severe anxiety of fearing to be pregnant), and peeing all the time, and I had what seemed like Implantation bleeding (just a really little trickle of red blood, but I thik that might've been because my boyfriend had figered me roughly the day before). Now, all of these sympthomps happened this week, the sex was on the 12th of april. My period is due tomorrow but I was SERIOUSLY freaking out (couldn't sleep etc). So today I took THREE pregnancy tests. Two that said that should be used after the first day of the missed period (but I guessed that since 17 days had passed since the risk today, it would be okay) and these came out both NEGATIVE. Also another one that said that could be used one day prior the expected date of my period (today!) with 99.9+ efectiveness, and also came out NEGATIVE. So I'm pretty sure that I am covered and that I'm not pregnant (I followed the instructions right! But please tell me if you think I might be wrong).
It was full penetration, also with condom, though I felt semen over my belly when it was over and my boyfriend rested over me with the condom still on. However the tip was full when he took it out so it could've been just sweat. I don't think it could've reached my vagina anyways and I'm on the pill, so the only reason that I've for stressing out so much is the sympthoms.


However, my question is: I haven't gotten pregnant from this sex, it seems. But could I still get pregnant from it? I mean: apparently I haven't been fertilized and nothing has implanted into my uterus wall. Can that still happen now, 17 days after the risk???
Thank you so much and sorry for any spelling mistakes, I'm not a native speaker. Please answer, Ii'm seriously freaking out... I'm afraid my period won't come tomorrow beacuse of how nervious I am and then I will start thinking that I could've gotten pregnant after doing the tests today or something like that. Please please help.

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Robin Lee
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Hi Paulette


No, pregnancy cannot happen now from the sex you had on April twelfth. That's just not how pregnancy works. Here's some information on the reproductive process:

Where DID I Come From? A Refresher Course in Human Reproduction

I think that you're saying that you're concerned that the symptoms you are having could be from pregnancy. Even if you had gotten pregnant, symptoms would not be showing up this early. You might find this piece helpful in understanding how many reasons there are for symptoms that people usually just attribute to pregnancy.

Chicken Soup for the Pregnancy Symptom Freakout's Soul

It sounds like not only do you use the birth control pill but you and your boyfriend used a condom which did not break. While no birth control method or methods provide 100% protection against pregnancy, birth control pill plus condom comes so very darn close to that. Here's information on the effectiveness rates of two birth control methods if you'd like to take a look:

The Buddy System: Effectiveness Rates for Backing Up Your Birth Control With a Second Method

For future reference, you will want to make sure that the condom is removed and safely discarded right after sex, as that is part of effective condom use.. Keeping the condom on while cuddling afterwards isn't part of effective condom use.

However, since you've had negative pregnancy tests (and yes, 17 days after a suspected risk is enough time to wait)I think you can trust that you're not pregnant from this. [Smile]

Know that your withdrawal bleed (which is what we call a period for someone on hormonal birth control) might be delayed by this anxiety as a menstrual period sometimes can be, and if for some reason the withdrawal bleed doesn't show up tomorrow, that is not a cause for panic.

Have you been able to talk to your boyfriend about how worried and anxious you are?

--------------------
Robin

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Paulette
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Hello! Thanks for being so quick [Smile] Yes, we've talked, he waited the results of the test with me, and went to buy it with me, and we were both very scared, so I think we won't be having this kind of sex for a while. The bad part is that we really enjoy sex, but we're always scared about pregnancy risks.

I'll read the article on reproduction now, thank you [Smile] So if I haven't gotten pregnant yet, I can't get pregnant from that sex, right? After I had sex, what's the time when I can become pregnant? Thank you!

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Paulette
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I thought that for example if the sperm met my egg five days after the sex, and then took one day more fertilizing(i don't know this world in english, sorry [Frown] ) , and then took ten days to implant, that'd be 16 days, so probably the test I took today wouldn't be accurate, because i'd have been pregnant for only one day. Can you explain this to me? I can't understand it. Please!!!
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Paulette
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I'm actually freaking out about that [Frown]
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September
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A pregnancy can take up to a week to complete. So if you tested 17 days after the risk, you can be sure that those results are accurate.

--------------------
Johanna
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"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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Paulette
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So there's NO way I can get pregnant from that sex, right? Why is that? It doesn't work after a week? Can you explain it for me? I hope I'm not bothering :/

Also I need some advice on how to calm down, you say I can't be pregnant and I believe you, but I don't know why I'm just still really scared, probably because I never had to take a test before and I don't know, I don't know how to handle this situation, I'm even throwing up because I'm so anxious. I'm also aware that this can delay my period and instead of calming me down that just makes me more anxious. Help please I'm really depressed and I have no one to talk to [Frown]

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Paulette
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I just read that I have to test three weeks after the risk? I don't know what to do, I can't wait that much [Frown]
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Robin Lee
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HI Paulette,

When you say you have no one to talk to, I'm wondering: can you not talk to your boyfriend? Are there other friends from whom you could get support?

Can you tell me a little more about what is confusing you regarding not being able to get pregnant from sex that you had a couple of weeks ago? I'm not sure what is concerning you there so not sure how to answer your question.

Well, what things do you usually do to help yourself calm down when you have strong feelings of worry or fear?

--------------------
Robin

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Paulette
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I can talk to my boyfriend, but I don't want to worry him. My friends are studying right now and in another city, so no. [Frown]
I need to know if the results of my test were definitive, I mean, that I won't have to do another one tomorrow in case I got pregnant after making the first two tests. Does the sperm dies or how is that I can't get pregnant after a week of the sex?
I am crying right now and I am alone, my family isn't at home either. I am really freaking out.

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Robin Lee
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Oh..I think I see what you're asking.

NO, you wouldn't have gotten pregnant after the first two tests.

The semen doesn't just stay in your body. Plus, you were using a condom, so it's unlikely that any semen got into your vagina.
But, if it had, it wouldn't still be there. Sperm has a life span. They don't just hang around waiting for something to happen, but die off pretty quickly.


Sometimes, it can be too soon to test for pregnancy, but that doesn't mean that pregnancy can still happen after the test if it hasn't happened already. It just means that the process of pregnancy wasn't at a point where the test would detect it.

However, with the birth control you used, pregnancy is very very unlikely. If it would make you feel less worried, you can take another pregnancy test today or tomorrow and know that the result is accurate.

Also, it's okay to talk to your boyfriend. I understand you not wanting to worry him, but this is important, and the way you're feeling about this affects both of you.
Does this help?

--------------------
Robin

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Paulette
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Yes, thank you very much... So you think the tests I took might be wrong?
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Paulette
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The test I took said that it was designed to detect early pregnancies...
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Robin Lee
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No, I don't think the test results might be wrong. I'm sorry if that's what it sounded like. I was just trying to explain the process and the difference between becoming pregnant after taking a test (not possible unless there's more sexual activity) and the body just being further on in the pregnancy process so it being easier for a test to detect the pregnancy hormone it looks for to see if there's pregnancy or not.

As I said, you're using a reliable form of birth control (two of them actually) and already had negative tests.
.

Are you satisfied with the test results? That is, what would help you stop worrying right now?

--------------------
Robin

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Paulette
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Thank you for all your help. I finally got my period today, just when I should. I've one last question: I am aware that the period whilst on the pill is kind of a "fake" period. So would it come anyways even if I'm pregnant? Or getting it just means I'm not? I just want to be sure. Can you explain why getting my "fake" period would mean i'm not pregnant? thanks very very very mmuch you've been really helpful:)
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Molias
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I think this article about how the placebo week and withdrawal bleed work might make things a little clearer.

Note that when you're taking BC pills, your endrometrial lining still builds up a bit (often not as much, which is why withdrawal bleeds tend to be lighter than periods for many users) and sloughs off during the withdrawal bleed. A withdrawal bleed is a sign that someone isn't pregnant just like a menstrual period is for someone who isn't taking birth control pills.

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