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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Emergencies and Crises » Biggest mistake...possibly pregnant!?

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Author Topic: Biggest mistake...possibly pregnant!?
wanderingsnowflake
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Member # 101919

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PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME!

I have read so many so many posts here on Scarleteen (all the pregnancy risks etc...)and I know everyone here is busy, but I cannot seem to find reassurance anywhere. I am deathly afraid of pregnancy and can tell you that I will NEVER be doing whatever I did again. I read a post by Dreema back in 2009, and I felt that this probably closely resembled my scenario(particularly how anxious she got!). Anyway, here goes...

On the 20th of December I engaged in "dry sex/humping" I'm not so sure what the correct term is. The problem here is I'm not sure if my partner ejaculated (from what I saw he didnt/ and when I asked he said there was no way, but I'm still very scared). I read that if we were fully clothed there was no risk (we were both in shorts and underwear). Nevertheless, I was in REALLY REALLY short shorts that were denim, I'm afraid the semen if there was any may have some how seeped into the sides of the shorts and gotten near my underwear (which could have been pushed aside from the movements) and close to my vulva (I think my scare is...what if there was any remote genitalia to genitalia contact [Confused] ) . After he left I tried wiping everything away being careful to wipe away from the vaginal opening... [Frown]

This risk took place when I was ovulating, because I had all the signs (i.e. vaginal discharge which was very clear and stretchy and after the risk I got a thin line of red blood in my vaginal discharge). My period cycle is usually 32-35 days long, and that was day 20 of my cycle [Frown] which means I was in my fertile period most probably.

Two days later because I was so afraid (46hrs after the incident) I took postinor 1 (my friend bought it for me) which is the morning after pill. Then 8 days after I got what seemed like a period (it was lighter than usual and less clotting, sorry TMI), but it definitely wasn't spotting, it was heavy on day 2 and 3 and bright red at times (I had to wear pads), and lasted 5 days. (this was probably 5-7 days earlier than my expected period)

Now, because I had become so paranoid, I looked up all possible scenarios as to what it was and consulted a doctor, I was too embarrassed to go buy a pregnancy test so I just went straight to the local GP. Thankfully she was very kind (despite laughing at me a bit) and said that the "period" I may have experienced would have been hormonal withdrawal bleeding (which is also legit)... but then where is my period? ANYWAY, this was 19 days after the accident, so she ordered a blood test for me so I would be less anxious. This was a qualitative blood test at 25iu I believe for bHCG levels. Luckily, it came back NEGATIVE (*relief)... my question is, would this test be the most accurate 19 days after the accident (I was technically already 5 days late for my period also if that makes sense)! Please Please reassure me!

I know everyone is busy and understand you do not want to answer pregnancy risk answers at the moment BUT this is the scariest thing that has every occurred to me so far. I've become so anxious all I can do is pray to God and then try to sleep to forget what occurred at all.

PLEASE PLEASE RESPOND... anyone THANK YOU SO MUCH. I would also like to say that this site has helped me so much, and glad that I found out about this site (albeit, only after the pregnancy scare [Frown] ...) I thank you all for reading my story and taking the time to respond!

- wanderingsnowflake

[ 01-15-2013, 02:47 AM: Message edited by: wanderingsnowflake ]

Posts: 12 | From: Australia | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
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Hey wanderingsnowflake and welcome to Scarleteen,

The most common potential side effect of emergency contraception is changes to the menstrual cycle. Many people experience these changes for a few months after taking emergency contraception, and the changes can include periods that are earlier or later than usual and spotting between periods.

Here's what I see in your post:
* You engaged in sexual activity that is known not to have pregnancy risks associated with it.
* You took emergency contraception.
* You had a period, albeit earlier than you expected.
* You visited a doctor who provided education and administered a pregnancy test which came back negative.

What do you think after seeing this list?

Have you seen these two articles?

Where DID I Come From? A Refresher Course in Human Reproduction

Pregnancy Scared?

--------------------
Robin

Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
wanderingsnowflake
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Hi Robin,

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to me. I guess I really needed just to get the facts straight, I read the articles and felt my risk is really really low 0.0001% if possible. I really don't even think I needed to take EC, but that was just to calm my nerves down!

SO, one last question do you think taking a qualitative blood test 19 days after the supposed risk will be accurate??! I don't know whether I should visit the GP and ask for a recheck a week or so following, or that I should be safe now, since it was wasn't a home pregnancy test!

Thanks for your response again, and I'm so glad to hear back from you so soon!

~Wanderingsnowflake

[ 01-15-2013, 02:14 PM: Message edited by: wanderingsnowflake ]

Posts: 12 | From: Australia | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
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HI Wanderingsnowflake,

You're very welcome! [Smile]

Yes, I would say that 19 days afterwards was enough time for the test result to be accurate, especially given all the other facts. [Smile]

If you're still feeling uncertain, you could get a home pregnancy test for yourself (they're also very accurate) or call your doctor's office and ask whoever deals with medical questions over the phone (often a nurse) if they think you need to come in for another test.

Here's an article on pregnancy testing that will give you more information with which to make a decision.

Peeing on a Stick: All About Pregnancy Tests

--------------------
Robin

Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
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I'd also like to check in with you. From the title of your post, and what you said above, it sounds like you really don't feel ready for the type of sexual activity you engaged in. How are you feeling in regards to communicating this to your partner?

Even though you're frightened by it and are choosing not to engage in dry sex again for a while for your emotional well-being, does it make sense to you why it doesn't actually pose a pregnancy risk?

If you need help figuring out what you're comfortable with, and how to communicate that to your partner, please let us know. [Smile]

[ 01-15-2013, 02:32 PM: Message edited by: Robin Lee ]

--------------------
Robin

Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
wanderingsnowflake
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Thank you so much Robin!

I really think I'm just very anxious (you clearly probably would have guessed by now...this was my first time and by all means my last for a while). I have talked to my partner about it and we have agreed we took it a bit too far even though there really wasn't a pregnancy risk (we're not in a relationship so that being said it was even worse!), I really don't need that stress in my life! I'm so glad you responded so swiftly, I think I'll make another appointment with my doctors next week for 100% confirmation, because it would probably be 5 weeks by then since the risk and then give it a rest, by then it should be extremely accurate and just wait around for my period to come as well!

This experience has taught me a lot! I'm really not ready for anything of this nature, and definitely feel extremely uncomfortable with it! I have also spoken to my mum about it and she assures me everything is alright, but for my own anxiety and sane mind I need to do another test at the doctors (she'll probably think i'm crazy, but I don't care I need confirmation that I'm not pregnant)!

I thank you so much for your support, and I will not be taking any further risks until I feel 100% comfortable. I will definitely update you on what has happened.

The lesson was definitely learnt here, and my guilt and anxiety was probably the price, albeit i could possibly have done something further than dry sex and I would be even more stressed, but I'll just wait another week until Wednesday or so and do my final check [Smile]

THANK YOU SO MUCH ROBIN and SCARLETEEN! I would not know what to do if you guys were not available to help me, I tried a couple of other places and came back with very little information, so keep up the awesome work! Let me know if I can do anything to help [Big Grin]

[ 01-15-2013, 03:54 PM: Message edited by: wanderingsnowflake ]

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wanderingsnowflake
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I'll just like to add that I had the most embarrassing conversation with my partner to which he was quite mature about it and assured me he would know if anything could have happened and that I should be stress free... but I'm prone to stress, until I can make absolute certain that there is nothing to worry about, it will always be hanging on in the back of my mind [Frown] .... (*what if??* I was in the 0.0001% to get pregnant) which is very terrible, and I need to learn to let go, but it's difficult if you are dealing with risks like pregnancy!
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Robin Lee
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Hey There!

I'm so glad you felt comfortable talking to your Mom and to the guy you engaged in this activity with, and that you felt supported in both conversations! [Smile]

By all means taking care of ourselves includes taking care of our mental health as well as our physical, and keeping stress levels down is a big part of that. No reason to do anything you're not 100% comfortable with.


And again, you're welcom. I'm glad you've found the information here to be helpful.

--------------------
Robin

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wanderingsnowflake
Neophyte
Member # 101919

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Hi Robin and Scarleteen,

Just a quick update! Being paranoid as I am I did another blood pregnancy test today! Result is NEGATIVE [Smile] )

Thank goodness! I would like to be a mum one day just not now! I thank everyone at scarleteen and especially Robin for the support that I received!

AS it has been 4.5 weeks since the risk, can I be 100% sure this is accurate? And can officially move on and learn a big lesson from this [Smile] ?

Awaiting the reply!

Thank you so so much [Smile] )

[ 01-23-2013, 01:26 AM: Message edited by: wanderingsnowflake ]

Posts: 12 | From: Australia | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
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Hi There,

Can you refer back to the articles I linked you to above? You should be able to find your answer there. [Smile]

Also, since you had another blood test (presumably at your doctor's office?) your doctor would be the best person to ask if that was enough time for the test to be considered accurate.

--------------------
Robin

Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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