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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Emergencies and Crises » help pleasee

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Author Topic: help pleasee
kitties20
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Member # 95092

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Around february 15th, me and boyfriend engaged in genital rubbing without clothing. However, the tip of his penis wasn't near my vulva/vagina. Rather, the shaft of the penis was near the opening and the head was facing his stomach. He hadn't ejaculated during this event, nor did he ejaculate prior. He said he had showered and urinated before we engaged in these activities.

My question is, even though this was direct genital rubbing, there was no contact with semen but there could've been contact with pre ejaculate (but idk if this is likely, considering the head was never near my vaginal opening?) is this still a risk?

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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STI risks exist with this kind of activity.

Pregnancy risks can, too, but if he did not ejaculate or get anywhere near it, you'd figure your level of risk is about the same as when using withdrawal properly with intercourse. Estimates for perfect use of that are typically that it is 96% effective during one year of use.

So, if you don't want to take those kinds of risks, this is something not to do again in the future without using methods to reduce risks of STIs and pregnancy, which would be condoms and an additional method of contraception is you like.

Since it's been more than 120 hours, it's too late to talk about emergency contraception, so you'll just have to wait this out per pregnancy. With STI risks, everyone having any kind of genital sex or who has should be tested at least once a year.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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kitties20
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but is pregnancy like really likely in this scenario? i know you said 96%, but the head was never near the vaginal opening. doesnt the head need to be near the opening for pregnancy to be probable?
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Heather
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For pregnancy risks to exist, there needs to be either or both:
a) direct contact between a penis and the genitals of someone with a vulva (your vulva, anal area or vagina) and/or
b) direct contact with seminal fluids between someone with a penis and someone with a vulva.

And with younger people, whose fertility tends to be higher than for others (namely, those over 30), it's sound to figure any of those things can create potentially high pregnancy risks.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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kitties20
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sorry to be asking so many questions, but would you say that i am at a significant risk for pregnancy then?
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Heather
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Like I said, you said that he basically used withdrawal: he didn't ejaculate anywhere on or near you throughout. So, again, we know that in estimates in perfect use, which that is, withdrawal is around 96% effective in one year of use. That means there likely was a risk, but probably a small one.

Personally, I'd be more concerned about STIs than pregnancy with this scenario.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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kitties20
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oh okay! thank you so much [Smile] sorry for all the questions
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Heather
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No need to be sorry, that's what we're here for!

Do you know where to go to get tested? How about talking with your partner about safer sex, contraception and risks: feel able to do that?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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kitties20
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We've talked it over and we've decided that we're staying away from these activities. Its no fun whenever one of us freaks out, so we decided that for each others health, its better that we stop.

and as far as testing goes, i know where to go [Smile] thanks for your help!

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Heather
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You got it! [Smile]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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kitties20
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Hi again, so i really don't mean to be a bother. I just really want to clear things up.

i was searching around the boards and i saw that some people had concerns about being fingered with fresh ejaculate and how that can form a potential risk. But if someone was to be fingered with pre cum, that wouldn't be sufficient enough for a pregnancy? in my case, since the head wasn't near the opening, can that count as somewhat the same as being fingered with pre cum? both are kind of like indirect contact in a sense right?

please correct me if i am wrong, i am just curious. not trying to be a bother

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Robin Lee
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You're not a bother. There's so much information out there that it's hard to figure these things out.

Basically, as Heather said, the genital contact creates a pregnancy risk in a way that fingering does not, even with precum on the fingers. This has to do with how sperm doesn't like making stops between the penis and the vagina, and being on fingers equals making a stop, so the sperm are much less viable.

It's stil the same scenario as you and Heather discussed above, where genital contact can be a pregnancy risk and you can liken what happened to successful use of the withdrawal method in intercourse.

Does this make sense? [Smile]

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Robin

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kitties20
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Yes that makes sense [Smile] thank you for answer my question!
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kitties20
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just wanted to update: i got my period [Smile]

thanks for all your help!

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Saffron Raymie
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That's great news! Yay [Smile]

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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