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Author Topic: Really need some help :(
Mylah
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Basically something may have tooken place on a tram it may sound odds reading it right now but it has tooken me a lot of courage to write as I may sound a little stupid.

Basically I was on a trams and their was a man in front of me and it felt like he's penis could have been out now don't get me wrong I'm not 100% sure it could have been the way he's top looked but where I don't know it's really scaring me [Frown] and I simply didnt know who to talk to. All I could feel was something sweaping past my leg area I'm not sure if it was near my area I honestly am just freaked out. This happened on Monday

I'm wondering if in fact he's penis was out and it did sweap past my area a few times would that pose any risk of pregnancy or any like std or sti?

I saw him today and to me it took again like something was poking out of his top like a boner but I can't be sure, I don't know if it's me seeing things or maybe just being really anxious but I feel really scared about this matter and aswell as the questions I asked before I'm wondering if you could tell me how I sort of feel better about this matter

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Mylah
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Just like to add I was wearing two pairs of leggins and undies as my clothing for the bottom half.

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Mylah
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I don't know if I'm more anxious about what risks this could carry or the fact what COULD have tooken place if in fact he's penis was out :/

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Robin Lee
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Hi Mylah,

For whether or not this was a pregnancy risk, please see the articles you've already been given about pregnancy risks.

Are you saying that you think this man's penis wasn't in his pants? That is, that it was bare? If so, I can certainly understand how it would be upsetting to encounter that on the tram. .

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Robin

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Mylah
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I didnt think their way any pregnancy risks in think I'm more scared about what could of happened. Well like I said I'm not sure i didn't see it but the way it looked it looked like it was either out and under he's shirt I don't wanna say it was because obviously I don't know for sure but the fact it could have been has really scared me :/ today when I see him I put my bag Infront of me I couldn't move on the tram as its packed that why everyone was so close together.

As theirs no risk of pregnancy I have rea through the article and it's days about lice and Trichomoniasis that's what I was concerned about aswell? I was wondering under what circumstances would they be spread ? Could thy be in my situation. As ill be honestly I don't have much knowledge on that sort of stuff.

It was very scary I haven't spoken to anyone because it litrally could have been just something completely different and I can't accuse him when I ain't 100% sure but I'm trying to change my root of travel to avoid this as it had scared me alot because not long ago a girl on a bus got raped by a man and I think that's what makes me more anxious

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Robin Lee
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It sounds like you're worried about your personal safety. Has this man given you any other reason to worry about your safety?

You were wearing clothes. he was wearing clothes. There's no risk of STI transmission or pregnancy. As we make clear in this post, this needs to be the end of our conversation about that:

http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/ultimatebb.php?/ubb/get_topic/f/14/t/000371/p/1.html#000000

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Robin

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Mylah
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Oh not I no now about risk of pregnancy but in the dry sex it says it can past sti? And what about if he's penis was bare but I was wearing leggins and undies would that' be any risk of sti transmission.

And he didnt seem weird or anything like anything I make me feel unfortable it was his what I 'think' I saw that scared me. Like the other day I was walking up the shop for my mum maybe about 5minutes away from my house and these two men approached me and was like 'your alright baby girl' and that scared me aswell as they some up to me so I think over all when I'm on my own infeel very vulnerable [Frown]

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Mylah
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Well I say saw I felt something brush past me but I can't be sure on what that was it could have been he's tshirt or just something else that's why I was worried about the sti thing if he's penis was bare and brushed past my area a few times. I know I can't be sure of what it was but aslong as I know theirs no other risks. I think I can start to try and deal with what happened like I mentioned I think I will just either get I'm the tram earlier so I have a seat away from people or change my route of travel if I feel that uneasy

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Heather
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You had pants on: you do not have any way of having contracted a genital STI from anyone when you did.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Mylah
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So basically aslong as one persons has clothing it cannot be passed on? It has to be direct contact between gentials?

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Robin Lee
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It might help to remember that STIs are called STIs because they are primarily transmitted through sexual contact. So, no sexual contact, or really physical contact of any kind? No STI.

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Robin

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Mylah
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Alright Thankyou sorry for the question I generally don't know a lot in how they are passed as I know some can be passed through a number of ways. Thankyou

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Heather
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Think about it this way: if you are keeping your mouth closed, you don't have to worry about food getting in there, right? Like you can't be like, "Did I swallow an apple?" if you didn't even open your mouth.

For sexually transmitted infections to be genitally transmitted or acquired, people need to be having direct skin-to-skin or direct fluid-to-skin contact, just like with pregnancy. Just like with pregnancy, this can't happen, that contact isn't happening, when people have clothes on.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Heather
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And for more info on this? In the navigation bar up top, you'll see a link to "Infection Section," where we have a page for EVERY current STI that includes clear info on how they are acquired. So, that's all there for you if you want that information: this doesn't have to be a question mark unless you want it to be. The info's right there. [Smile]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Mylah
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I not was asking because on one of te articles to be exact the can I get pregnant or sti from that, on dry sex it's days a low risk... And possible risk of lice and something else begginging with t ? That's why I ask like what causes the risks of getting that through dry sex. Would it have to be like a really thin layer, or would it have to be really really wet enough to soak through clothes.

That's why I was confused

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Heather
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Well lice are really their own thing, be they head lice or pubic lice. They can jump from person to person and can live on fabric.

I don't know what "something with a t is," but if you go back and look and put it here, I'm sure I can tell you about that.

Again, like I just explained, genital STI transmission isn't going to happen when people are dressed like you are describing in your post here. You can accept that or not, but there it is.

[ 09-11-2013, 10:43 AM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Mylah
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The other one was Trichomoniasis I have no idea what it even is I've never heard of it.

I've heard about lice I know they can be passed on fabrics and towels and stuff but I'm sure I'd know if I ever got anything like that as I presume they would itch.

I know accept what your saying I just wasnt sure on all this stuff like I never though it would cause a risk but as I was unsure on the circumstances I didnt know 'if' he's penis was bear but I had clothing on if that caused any risk.

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Heather
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YOU had on clothes. YOU did. Even one person being dressed means this is not an issue.

Information on Trich can be found right here: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/infection/the_sti_files_trichomoniasis

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Mylah
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Thank you for calming me! I will have a look at that link . It didn enter my mind I guess it's me something I sit and I thin and one issue becomes like a million where I look Into things.

I was trying to research online but I didnt want to get false information that caused to me worry further so honestly thank you [Smile]

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Believe in yourself, because if you don't who else will?

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Heather
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You know, I think feeling freaked and scared about harassment or assault makes sense. These things are scary, but, in a context like this, not because of pregnancy or STIs. Rather, because it sucks to feel like we might not have a choice per when people are sexual with us.

OTOH, if the fear is when there are simply men near or around you, because they have penises, and you think you might see a shadow of them being erect -- which will happen sometimes, and totally out of the control of the person with the penis -- then I think you might need to take a moment to check if you're not moving into irrational fear territory. especially if you are worrying about things like pregnancy or STIs when you are dressed on a train with other dressed people.

And if that's happening, you're just kind of scared around people or men in a more general way? That's a cue you are having, likely, some big social anxiety, and the person to talk to about that is a mental healthcare provider.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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