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Author Topic: Transitioning fetish?
alphadec
Neophyte
Member # 108254

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Lately, I've wondered something about myself. I've known I was bigendered leaning slightly more feminine for about a year, but I often find myself thinking about transitioning, since I'm physically male.

I mean, I don't care that much about what I have down there, but the thought of not having anything dangling around seems like it'd be much more comfortable, plus I think it'd be nice to have breasts. However, aside from the family issues it'd definitely cause, I'm not 100% sure if I actually feel like it's something I want to do to better myself, or if it's more that the thought of doing this is like a strange fetish.

Like, when I start thinking about transitioning, I find the thought arousing; like I'm turned on by the idea of it more than actually wanting to go through with it. That seems strange to me, because if I actually did want to go down that path, wouldn't I be more "relaxed" about it, so to say?

So, again I'm not sure if I feel I actually want to do this, or if the thought is some strange fetish of mine. Any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks in advance

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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So, a fetish, just to be clear from a sexology standpoint, is sexual arousal that's about an object, not a person. Or, about objectifying a part of a person, like with a foot fetish.

That given, I'm not sure "fetish" is really the right word here.

What I hear you saying -- and please correct me if this sounds off to you -- is that the idea of transitioning is sexually appealing to you. In other words, it feels exciting to you sexually.

If I have that right, then I don't find that at all surprising, nor do I think it may tell you anything about if transitioning is or isn't right for you. Gender, experiencing gender, "performing" gender certainly is a part of many people's sexualities, so I also don't think there's anything uncommon about finding that the idea of transitioning gender may be part of, or have an impact on, your sexuality unusual.

As you probably already know, the process of transitioning is a long one, one where there's plenty of time to figure out what you want along the way. And if you're thinking of hormones or surgeries, these routes require therapy, where you'd have plenty of changes to talk about these particular feelings.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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alphadec
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That is pretty much on the dot: the idea is sexually exciting. I wasn't quite sure if "fetish" was the right word, to be honest.

Good to know it's not that out of the ordinary. Thanks [Smile]

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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If gender is part of your sexuality -- and while it isn't for everyone, I'd say it is for many, if not most people -- then it....well, being part of your sexuality isn't surprising, you know? [Smile]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Molias
Scarleteen Volunteer
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Hi alphadec,

I really don't think feeling like changing your body is a sexually exciting thing means that medical/physical transition would be less legitimate for you than it would be for someone who doesn't have that feeling.

A lot of people with gender dysphoria feel discomfort with their bodies to some extent, and that can make sexual intimacy with a partner, or even masturbation or feeling attractive and sexy on one's own, pretty difficult. So changing one's body to be more in line with one's gender identity can be a really sexual or sexually exciting thing! Not everyone who transitions will have that feeling, but just from personal anecdotes picked up from knowing a bunch of trans folks, I don't think it's unusual, and I certainly don't see it as a negative thing. =)

Posts: 1352 | From: San Francisco | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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