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miaaaaaaa
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So I've recently had a dry humping pregnancy scare which was dumb because I talked to 2 different people on here and they both said it is impossible to get pregnant that way & that I shouldn't worry, but since then, I've been bloated and my boobs have been tender. The bloating thing has got me all kinds of freaked out. But I'm supposed to start my period in about a week, so the bloat could be contributed to that. I just don't know what to think anymore!! I just need some tips on how to not be so paranoid and how to believe the facts!!!! Thanks
Mia

Posts: 26 | From: texas | Registered: Jul 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Redskies
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Perhaps first, knowing that variation in our bodies is perfectly normal, and expecting some of that variation. Anyone's body being exactly the same day in, day out, is just not going to happen, because bodies aren't machines. Among people who menstruate, some will experience more variation than others over the course of their cycle, and no-one will have exactly the same changes every single month.

If we're repeatedly worried about the same thing, and the facts don't seem to help the worry, that usually means our brain is trying to tell us something. So, it might be worth thinking about why you're having these worries:
- do you regularly have worry or anxiety about other things?
- do you very strongly want to do the sexual activities that you're doing with your boyfriend?
- do you feel good about being sexually active, or do you feel any conflict?
- do you think the people closest to you, like your family or community, would support or accept your choices about your sexual life? Does their opinion matter to you?

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The kyriarchy usually assumes that I am the kind of woman of whom it would approve. I have a peculiar kind of fun showing it just how much I am not.

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miaaaaaaa
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Hey, the facts and everyone that told me I was NOT pregnant helped, but I'm just worried because I'm still having symptoms!! But symptoms wouldn't appear in 2 weeks right? I think if I ended up pregnant, I would be in sooo much trouble. Im only 16. I'm just having anxiety because they would be sooo disappointed. So I'm always extra careful. That's the first time I'd ever done anything like that. And me being the paranoid person I am, of course I'm gonna think the worse.
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Robin Lee
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Hi mia,

What are you afraid people will be disappointed by or about specifically?

I'm also wondering, as Redskies was, if you have experienced this kind of all consuming worry or anxiety about other things before?

if so, how have you handled your worry or anxiety in those situations?

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Robin

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miaaaaaaa
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I haven't really had this kind of fear before. So I don't know how to handle it. I'm just worried I'm pregnant still
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Robin Lee
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Maybe you haven't had fears that have been this strong, but what do you generally do to help yourself when you're feeling worried or even just mildly afraid?

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Robin

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miaaaaaaa
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I usually just don't think about it, but this has me so worked up!! I just need a final reassurance
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Robin Lee
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You know, we've already talked this through, and given you the materials you need in order to make your own assessment and get your own reassurance. [Smile]

The facts haven't changed between a few days ago and now. [Smile]


I think you're saying that it feels like you can't stop thinking about this, but, since that has worked for you with other situations, I am pretty sure it will help you here too. It's harder, certainly, because you feel like there's a lot more at stake here, which just means, I think, that it will take some more effort on your part to not think about it.

In other words, not thinking about this can still help you here, but it's going to take a little more work and intention from you to do that.

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Robin

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miaaaaaaa
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That's exactly it... I just can't stop thinking about this. I need to though because its just gonna make matters worse. I have to stop thinking that every little ache or pain is related to pregnancy
Posts: 26 | From: texas | Registered: Jul 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
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So, maybe the first step here needs to be not reading anything about pregnancy, which includes not coming here to talk about your fears.

Instead, every time you start thinking "oh, what if this is a sign of pregnancy" you do something to distract yourself. It might be helpful to make a list of things that you could do, such as reading a book, watching a movie, calling a friend, doing a crossword puzzle, et cetera.

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Robin

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miaaaaaaa
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Ok:) thanks!!
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Robin Lee
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You're welcome.

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Robin

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miaaaaaaa
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good news... my period showed up today!!!! i am sooooo relieved
Posts: 26 | From: texas | Registered: Jul 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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