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Author Topic: What's wrong with condoms?
Angelica Maria
Activist
Member # 96266

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So the boy I was telling y'all about before said that he doesn't like condoms. My mom told me I shouldn't tell boys I'm in birth control because men will find a reason to talk me out of using condoms. Here's what I don't understand. Why do most boys not like protected sex? I don't understand why it's so different? Why do they need to excuse themselves from condom use? I just don't see what's wrong with protection to them.

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*Angelica, A, A-Maria, Maria, Angie; address me as either of those* We shall never deny an individual's sexuality, even the most ridiculous identity. We are free to love who we love and identify our sexual orientation our way. Theres no rules!

Posts: 57 | From: NY, USA | Registered: Jul 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
September
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 25425

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There are plenty of reasons why some people may not like condoms. So to find out why this particular person does not like condoms, you'd have to ask them.

It sounds like you want to use condoms for sexual contact with this person, which is smart. If you've made that clear to him, and he's not willing to meet your needs on that, then it sounds like he just may not be a very great person to be sexually active with.

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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Angelica Maria
Activist
Member # 96266

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Well, theres a part of me that does and another that doesn't. It's my mom and my best friend who are pushing me to use it. Aside of my birth control, forget the pregnancy, lets think about the stds and hiv stuff for a minute. Do you think it's sound to believe someone who you wanna be friends with benefits with when they say they've been tested before and are responsible for it? Is it safe to take their word?

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*Angelica, A, A-Maria, Maria, Angie; address me as either of those* We shall never deny an individual's sexuality, even the most ridiculous identity. We are free to love who we love and identify our sexual orientation our way. Theres no rules!

Posts: 57 | From: NY, USA | Registered: Jul 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Not if you want to do a good job reducing your risks, no.

To reduce the risk of STIs as best we can, we have to combine use of barriers WITH testing, not just do one or the other.

More on that here: Safe, Sound & Sexy: A Safer Sex How-To

And here: What Safer Sex Isn't

Also? I'd say that in general, someone who refuses to use condoms is usually not also someone who gets tested regularly (outside some professional porn stars or sex workers).

More often, someone who cares enough about their health to get tested regularly also does what's most likely to actually prevent STIs, which is using condoms. More often, someone who refuses to use condoms but says they get tested? Isn't being honest about testing.

[ 06-21-2013, 12:14 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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