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Author Topic: Questions on Pregnancy, help please?
Chris Mike
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First of all, thank you so much for anyone who contributed their time in answering my doubts here.

So here's the scenario like, last week me and my girlfriend were making out. We felt kinda horny so we started to strip each other's clothing. Not long after we were both completely naked, and started giving mutual masturbation. We were giving each other handjobs and then in between she asked why is my penis wet when I didn't even ejaculate (I think its pre-ejaculate), she even guide my hand towards my penis to feel it. After that we continued giving each other handjobs. But soon after I realised that my hand that touched my penis filled with pre-ejaculate was the same hand I used to finger her. Her vagina was also wet at that time.

So I was wondering whether:
1. Is it likely that she'll get pregnant if I fingered her with my hand filled with pre-ejaculate? (Not sure whether it was still wet or dry at that time but her vagina was wet.)
2. How do you diffrentiate an implantation bleeding and period bleeding?
3. How long is a late period to be considered missed?
4. Is dry sex (with only underwear and panties on) safe even though I pre-ejaculate and she's wet through our undergarmets?


Here are some additional info:
1. It's too late for Plan B as this incident was 6 days ago. (Heard that Plan B must be taken in 5 days time.)
2. Her period was 19 days prior to this incident, most likely it's her ovulation period, which means she has a high fertility rate at that point in time.
3. She has few early signs which relates to pregnancy possibility (e.g. More than usual trips to the bathroom, easily tired), but will these pregnancy symtoms show up this early?
4. She lacked sex-ed so I told her that pregnancy only occurs when penetration happens, this should keep her calm as I don't want stress to delay her period, she already have enough of stress (Finals of three subjects next week and A-levels examination results).
5. I ejaculated once but I pee once or twice after I ejaculated before this incident.

Although I read some article provided by Joey (thanks!) regarding this matter, none of them provided solid information that I needed. I've saw many post on the internet (healthask, yahoo answer, wiki answer, etc.) that some girls do get pregnant due to pre-ejaculate, some even got pregnant by only wiping themselves using tissue paper after using the toilet with semen on their hand. I'm worried about this incident since the day it occured so I hope that the kind souls of Scarleteen can provide a reliable answer regarding this matter. Feel free to ask any additional info if you think it's not enough to make a statement. Thanks once again !

*I'm so sorry if this is in the wrong section, my apologies!

[ 03-12-2013, 11:12 AM: Message edited by: Chris Mike ]

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Robin Lee
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Hey Chris Mike and welcome to Scarleteen,

I'm not sure which articles you read here, but can you take a look through the articles and information provided in this link, please?

http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/ultimatebb.php?/ubb/get_topic/f/27/t/027786.html

If you have any more questions after reading that, come on back.

Also, anywhere you post your question is fine, just only post it once, please. [Smile]

Thanks.

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Robin

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Chris Mike
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Thanks for responding to my thread !

Yes I've previously got the link through Joey and read it thoroughly, but there's still some doubt in me.

In this article: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/pregnancy_scared

Have you not had any kind of sex at all (and were not sexually assaulted), but are worried because of something like touching a partner's hand then touching yourself, or using a towel that may have had dried semen on it? These kinds of scenarios do NOT pose risks of pregnancy. Sperm and ovum need specific conditions in which to co-create a pregnancy, and these ain't them.

and this

Were you only kissing, having oral sex, manual sex and/or dry sex, where someone (or everyone) had clothes on and/or no one ejaculated on or very near anyone else's vulva? These kinds of sex do NOT present pregnancy risks, though some present risks of STIs.

is somehow related to my scenario, but not completely. I didn't ejaculate anywhere near her vagina, but her vagina somehow came in contact with my pre-ejaculate fluid through my hand, is there by any chance a risk of pregnancy? And if dry sex is performed only in our underwear and pre-ejaculate fluid is visible from the outside, can the sperm from the pre-ejaculate fluid travel from it to my girlfriends underwear when her underwear is wet too? Thanks !

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September
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quote:

Have you not had any kind of sex at all (and were not sexually assaulted), but are worried because of something like touching a partner's hand then touching yourself, or using a towel that may have had dried semen on it? These kinds of scenarios do NOT pose risks of pregnancy. Sperm and ovum need specific conditions in which to co-create a pregnancy, and these ain't them.

Welcome to the board, Chris. Good to see you again [Smile]

I highlighted something in the section that you quoted, which I think covers your scenario. It doesn't matter whose hand came in contact with the pre-ejaculate, indirect contact like this does not pose a pregnancy risk.

Do you feel like we have your question covered now? Or is something still unclear?

[ 03-12-2013, 12:02 PM: Message edited by: September ]

--------------------
-joey
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"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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Chris Mike
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Hi Joey ! Does that also include the contact of my hand with pre-ejaculate then to her vagina? Because some statement from unreliable sources such as yahoo answer deemed that contact of pre-ejaculate with the vagina does pose a pregnancy risk :/ and mind answering the other questions in the thread post as well? Thanks a bunch !! (:
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September
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Let me point you to another section of the Pregnancy Scared article:

quote:
When pregnancy occurs, it is almost always when people have genital intercourse or other very direct genital-to-genital contact and/or when someone ejaculates directly inside a vagina or onto the vulva.
So, I hear you talking about a situation where you touched yourself, and then touched your partner's vagina. Can you see how that scenario does not include direct genital-to-genital contact?

So, yep: no matter whose hands came in contact with whose parts, that kind of indirect contact is not likely to create a pregnancy risk.

And, for future reference: Yahoo Answers is a terrible source for factual information.

As for your question regarding dry sex, that's also covered in the article:

quote:
Were you only kissing, having oral sex, manual sex and/or dry sex, where someone (or everyone) had clothes on and/or no one ejaculated on or very near anyone else's vulva? These kinds of sex do NOT present pregnancy risks, though some present risks of STIs.
Implantation bleeding is very light spotting that very rarely occurs when a fertilized egg implants in the uterine lining. Since it doesn't sound like you've had a pregnancy risk, there is also no reason to worry about that. Is your partner late for her period at all? Is she worried about a pregnancy risk? Have you been talking to her about your anxieties?

I think that we've answered your question regarding a pregnancy risk a few times, and given you enough links for you to read up, that there is nothing new we can tell you on that front. So instead of going over that again and again, I suggest that we try to explore why it is that you're so freaked, and how we can help you freak out less.

Do you have any idea why this is giving you such a hard time? How have you been dealing with your anxiety? Do you have any tools for dealing with anxiety?

--------------------
-joey
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"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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Allie R
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Hey Chris!

To iterate what Joey said, it doesn't matter whose hand came in contact with the pre-ejaculate... so yes, it also includes that.

Also, to address your other question, I'll also highlight something you wrote earlier in the thread, and provide you another source here:
quote:
Were you only kissing, having oral sex, manual sex and/or dry sex, where someone (or everyone) had clothes on and/or no one ejaculated on or very near anyone else's vulva? These kinds of sex do NOT present pregnancy risks, though some present risks of STIs.
Hope this clears things up!

--------------------
AAR

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Chris Mike
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Oh. Thank you so much for clearing my doubts! I've been worried about this for the past few days but it's all cleared up now thanks to all of you (: Noted ! Yahoo answers sometimes gave weird scenario that causes pregnancy too. About dry sex, is there a minimum thickness requirement of the fabric to block sperm from passing through? Because some underwear might be quite thin and possible for sperm to pass through due to it's microscopic size and when the underwear is wet.
Is implantation bleeding is merely a few spot of blood compared to period where a large amount of blood is discharged? Her period is due in another 2 days or so, but she told me that she's being having signs of PMS (Premenstrual syndrome) so I'm kinda relieved now as these are signs that her period is due soon. She is not worried at all as she thinks it's not theoretically possible to get pregnant this way. And no I've not been talking to her about my anxieties as I don't want to affect her mood. Our finals is coming and her period might be delayed due to stress so I didn't want to add oil to it.
Thank you so much for your help and suggestions! I might be freaked out due to several reasons:
1. Many search results from Google gave information that it is possible to get pregnant this way although not likely.
2. I am quite a paranoid person. Even though the risk is minimal as low as below 1%, I still recognized it and keep on seeing things from that point of view instead of the other 99% point of view. I felt that this way will allow me to deal with situations easier when the worse has happened.
The first few days after this incident was freaking me out to the extend that I will be thinking of the possibility of pregnancy almost everytime everyday. It isn't that bad now as compared to before. And I usually deal with this anxiety by searching the internet in order to find statements that will propose that my incident does not have a chance of pregnancy in order to calm myself down. And thanks Allie for making things clearer !

I also have some questions, hope you guys will spare the time to answer them, thanks! (:
1. Why isn't pregnancy likely when a hand came in contact with pre-ejaculate/semen touched the vagina but it's likely when we ejaculate at the opening of the vagina? Both ways have a common factor which is semen actually came in contact with the vagina. But why does one poses a risk while the other doesn't?
2. The size of the sperm is microscopic. Won't they be able to travel through fabric(underwear) as well? Especially when both the guy and girl's underwear is wet, doesn't it provide the sperm a better chance to travel to the vagina?
3. How late is a period to be considered missed? Some say 2 weeks while others might say a month or so. Provided that the female has a regular menstrual period(Latest period record was 2 weeks).

Thank you so much !

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Heather
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Dr. Google is a really, really crummy doctor. So is Journalist Google or Scientist Google. especially when you're not very good at knowing how to use it and weed out what's credible from what isn't. Seriously.

Per your questions above:
1. Because sperm cells are delicate, sensitive cells. They need the semen they're ejaculated with, and they also need VERY specific environments to remain viable and motile. being jostled around a lot, for instance, like going from penis to hand to wherever else, can break their "tails." Time spent outside body cavities with acceptable environments for them (only the testes and vagina, and only the vagina some of the time, even) makes them less viable and motile very quickly.

2. See above for part of this answer. But also, again, sperm cells NEED semen: it's not only what helps protect them, it's also how they can move at all. Without semen, they're a lot like fish out of water.

3. A period is generally considered late when it appears around or more than about five days when someone would expect it at the latest. A missed period is when someone doesn't get a given period in a cycle at all. Usually you'll know this happened when you get all the way to when the NEXT period is expected and get one then.

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Chris Mike
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Hello Heather ! Thanks for responding my questions. I know Google isn't reliable but I'm blinded when I'm freaking out about something and take account into every information thinking its real haha.

1. But if semen is ejaculated at the vagina opening, won't they be exposed to the environment, making them less viable and motile? Some said that sperm dies out very quickly when exposed to air. If semen is at the opening of the vagina how can it be able to fertilize the egg? Its already weaken and if it really does enter the vagina, there's still many stages like cervix, uterus and the fallopion tube that they need to travel. And on their journey to find the egg, wont the antibacteria there kill the sperm? So is there still a risk when semen has a direct contact with the vagina opening?

2. So sperm can only travel in semen? I thought sperm is able to travel in any liquid form substance such as pre-cum and water?

3. If the period is 1 month late but it came is it still considered having a late period or missed period?

Thank you !

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Heather
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Maybe you can change that habit? Really, when we are in a total panic, the very BEST thing we can do for ourselves is FIRST calm ourselves down. By all means, when we're very scared, our logical minds tend to shut down a whole lot, so we're not going to be the best judges of what information is credible or not.

1. When semen is ejaculated at the vaginal opening, both gravity and the nature of sperm cells most typically results in them semen -- and sperm cells -- making their way into the vagina. No one really yet knows how exactly, but sperm cells do seem to know that the cervix is where they need to go.

It might also help to remember that with a full ejaculation, we're usually talking about MILLIONS of sperm cells. But only a few hundred need to make it all the way to an ovum -- if one is there -- to potentially create a pregnancy. So, for sure, a whole bunch of sperm cells usually won't make it the whole way. They don't have to, though. But even when they do that STILL doesn't mean a pregnancy will always occur.

Our whole bodies are filled with oxygen, so talks about semen and 'air" aren't sound conversations. This isn't about air or oxygen. it's about hospitable environments for sperm, which are the testes, the urethra, and the vagina.

I don't know what you mean when you say antibacteria." Not only is that not actually a word, I'm not sure what you're trying to say when you've used it here.

2. When we are not talking about advanced in-vitro fertilization, but conception via sex, yes, sperm need semen both to travel and to help keep them viable.

3. Menstrual cycles are typically somewhere around a month long, so if someone didn't get a period one month, but got it around a month after they were expecting it, what's most likely is that they simply missed that previous period.

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Chris Mike
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1. I've been searching for information and found out that the pull-out method is not a really effective birth control as pre-ejaculate may contain sperms. But if pre-ejaculate only contain a small amount of sperm, won't it be impossible for them to reach the ovum to fertilize the egg? Theoretically only 1 sperm is required to fertilize the egg, but if only hundreds of sperm made it to the ovum out of millions from semen, won't the amount of sperm in pre-ejaculate seem impossible to get a girl pregnant?

If semen is left to dry, the sperm is considered dead once the semen is completely dry? And will sperm be able to survive outside their hospitable environments? IF so how long?

Isn't there some sort of cells and bacteria inside the vagina that kills harmful bacteria, like the ones that help us cure from sickness?

2. So if semen is unable to reach the egg, means that no sperm is able to fertilize the egg since it can't travel without semen?

3. So if a girl had a missed period, is it a sign that she is pregnant? And what if the girl misses a period and gets it during the next expected cycle, does it give a sign that the girl is not pregnant?

My girlfriend is currently 2 days late, but seeing from the hard times she went through this weeks finals, I guess stress is making her period late?

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Heather
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Really, it's wiser to look at HOW effective withdrawal is. It's not correct to say it's "not really" an effective method, because, like all ways or preventing pregnancy that CAN work, it can be effective, the question is just how much.

Withdrawal is estimated to be around 96% effective in perfect use, and that accounts for pre-ejaculate. It's around 73-82% effective in typical use, which usually is about someone not withdrawing soon enough before they ejaculate (not pre-ejaculate, ejaculate), or not withdrawing at all.

All in all, compared with all other methods that CAN work, that makes it one of the least effective in both perfect and typical use.

It actually doesn't take only one sperm to fertilize an egg, but a few hundred. And along the way, of the typically several hundred million sperm cells in a full ejaculation most won't make it. That's why while yes, pre-ejaculate can pose some risks, because it can contain sperm cells, without those kinds of numbers, the risk is rather minimal.

There's honestly no point in talking about dried semen: all it has the capacity to do is stain things, seriously.

Are there healthy bacteria within the vagina? Yes.

Semen doesn't need to, and won't, reach an ovum to create a pregnancy. The function of semen is to both keep sperm cells viable and motile, then help move them to the cervix. After that, sperm cells and parts of the female reproductive system take over with the job.

A missed period is most typically the first symptom of pregnancy most pregnant people will experience, but people also miss periods for other reasons. As well, a two day difference between cycles usually isn't a missed period: that kind of variation with cycles is typical.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Chris Mike
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Just wondering, how is the 4% failure rate possible in withdrawal method? Is it due to pre-ejaculation inside the vagina?

So a few hundred sperm is required to fertilize one egg provided that they already meet the egg?

And how minimal is the risk of pre-ejaculate? As low as 1%? And are they required to be in the vagina or can they be at the opening of the vagina?

Does the healthy bacteria within the vagina kills off sperm?

So sperm is only required to travel to the cervix through the semen, and after that semen is not required by the sperm anymore to be mobile and reach the egg?

But my girlfriend is already a week late, and I'm starting to get worried all over again, is it normal for a period to be a week or two weeks late?

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Allie R
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I believe the 4% accounts for pre-ejaculate, like Heather said, but I'm not 100% sure, if someone else could verify this?

I believe the extra hundred sperm work as helpers to one sperm cell trying to fertilize an egg.

Pre-ejaculate may contain sperm, so it comes down to the same rules: it needs to be inside or near the opening of the vagina.

I personally don't know if healthy bacteria in the vagina kills off sperm, if anyone else can shed some insight on this one.

Yes, like Heather also said, the purpose of semen is to keep sperm motile until it passes the cervix, upon where the sperm cells and the female reproductive system take over, per se.

Her period could be missed rather than late, and there are a slew of reasons outside of pregnancy why that might be the case. I don't know if we've linked you this article yet (M.I.A. or, Dude, Where's My Period?), but it may help you in terms of your last question.

[ 03-21-2013, 08:17 AM: Message edited by: Allie R ]

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AAR

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Heather
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Indeed, we can safely assume that that 4% risk, in one year of perfect use, estimated for withdrawal is about pre-ejaculation.

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Chris Mike
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But how is it possible for sperm to travel through the cervix without semen?

What do the extra hundred sperm does to help?

But how is sperm able to travel without semen through the cervix when their near the opening of the vagina in pre-ejaculation?

Can anyone else shed some light on whether healthy bacteria in the vagina kills off sperm? Thanks !

Thank God her period finally came ! Thou it's about a week late !

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Robin Lee
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The thing about the human body is that it's not a machine. WE know what will almost always be needed in order for a pregnancy to occur, but we also know that there is a small percentage of situations in which, when intercourse occurs without ejaculation, pre-ejaculate containing sperm can still contribute to a pregnancy. I don't know how else to answer this other than to say that bodies will sometimes do things we don't expect them to do.

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Robin

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Chris Mike
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So truth to speak is that there is no specific explanation or reason for it? I guess it can be labeled as 'God's Will'?
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Heather
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Chris, if you haven't already looked at this piece, it'll tell you things like what the helper sperm do: Where DID I Come From? A Refresher Course in Human Reproduction

Once sperm cells get into the cervix, there are fluids inside to keep it moving. The cervix is inside the vagina, though, not at the opening, so it sounds like you also may not entirely be getting the whole of that anatomy: Innies & Outies: The Vagina, Clitoris, Uterus and More

There isn't bacteria in the vagina that kills sperm cells. Rather, the pH of the vagina's acid balance -- again, this is the vagina specifically: once inside the cervix, sperm cells aren't in the vagina anymore -- is such that it's a tough space for sperm cells. Part of what seminal fluids do is to balance that out and protect sperm cells. As well, when a pregnancy has any possibility of happening, it's around ovulation time, and the vaginal and cervical secretions at that time are also more hospitable to sperm.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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