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Author Topic: no sexual pleasure :(
Member # 100540

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Hello, this is my first time posting, so if I'm doing something wrong please let me know [Smile] problem is that I don't get pleasure from masturbation anymore, and I'd like to figure out why and how I can fix that. I've had this problem before in 2008, but it went away naturally. At first, I asked my primary doctor about this, and he suggested i get a testosterone test, which had normal results. Then I saw 2 therapists, both of whom did not really help - they tried to help me by trying to by doing things like try to enjoy music more (listen to classic music carefully) or go back to school so I can get a job I like. None of their advice worked, and maybe after a few months, one day the problem went away.

Here's more detail about my problem. I am 36 years old. I've always been able to feel pleasure from oral sex, but not from intercourse (i.e. insertion into vagina). My experience is very limited; one night stands here and there. I still get morning erections, so physically, I seem fine, it's just that I can't seem to feel pleasure. The last time I was able to feel pleasure all the way through ejaculation is 9/25/2012. I can still become erect looking at erotic pictures or thinking erotic thoughts, but I just can't feel pleasure from it, so there's no point in masturbating.

I should point out that I have been eating soybeans almost daily for about a year or so for health reasons, but I also heard that it reduces testosterone, so I stopped eating it a few weeks ago. I've also heard that bananas and blueberries increase testosterone, which I've been eating almost daily for years now, which I thought would cancel out the soybeans, but now I've cut soybeans from diet entirely.

My therapists seemed to think I don't experience pleasure enough in general, but I don't agree. Activities I enjoy are watching and playing sports, reading, writing, watching tv, playing video games, trading stocks, and animals (I have a pet rabbit). When I do these activities, I am usually deeply involved, such as watching sports news daily, writing strategy guides for my video games, and following the stock market daily (buying and selling stocks on a regular basis). I enjoy watching my pet rabbit look for food or look at something in curiosity. I can always make myself laugh by looking at the funny pictures I've taken of my rabbit or even just thinking about the moments that were funny.

I hope this post wasn't too long; I wanted to describe my problem thoroughly so people can understand it. I would go to a sex therapist, but my insurance doesn't cover that. Thanks to anyone who can help [Smile]

Posts: 2 | From: usa | Registered: Nov 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 25425

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Joe, Scarleteen is a place that primarily serves people in their teens and twenties, and this userbase is where our priorities lie. So, while you are welcome to look around and see if you can find any articles or posts that address your question, please understand that we cannot devote much time to working with someone so far outside of our scope.

That said, our libido tends to naturally wax and wane over a lifetime, so periods of lower libido are perfectly normal and not necessarily a sign of anything amiss.

Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 100540

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I see, I'm sorry I didn't realize there was an age range for this site. Thanks anyway.
Posts: 2 | From: usa | Registered: Nov 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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