Donate Now
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Pregnant and need help

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Pregnant and need help
Member # 97615

Icon 9 posted      Profile for TravelAddict63     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I recently found out that I am pregnant through positive urine tests. It is unexpected and unwanted and happened despite using a condom, spermicide, and pulling out, and I don't remember the condom ever breaking. I am studying abroad in Costa Rica, where abortion is illegal.

I did not know or suspect I was pregnant. I had bleeding just three weeks ago that was heavy with clots and I thought it was my period. So I've been going out and drinking alcohol on the weekends, I drink coffee every day, and I have also recently been prescribed medication that is considered dangerous for pregnant women and unborn babies.

I don't know what to do. I think I have already unknowingly done things that are extremely harmful for the baby, such as drinking. I feel horrible. I don't want to have this baby. But I have a history of depression and I am so afraid of having an abortion. I know that I will feel overwhelming guilt. All of the information that I have found about abortion has said that women with a history of depression are more likely to experience emotional trauma from abortion. I am pro choice but my family is VERY VERY pro life. I am very close with them and the thought of having to keep this secret for the rest of my life is terrifying.

My boyfriend is very supportive and willing to help me with any decision I make, including helping me pay to fly to the states to have a legal abortion.

How do I possibly make this decision? I know that I do not want to have this baby, but I am afraid that an abortion will sink me into a depression and permanently estrange me from my family members, who hold very different beliefs from me.

Please, any advice at all would help.

Posts: 4 | Registered: Oct 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 25425

Icon 1 posted      Profile for September     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
TravelAddict, I am sorry to hear about the tough spot you are in. We'll try to help you through this, okay?

The first thing I would suggest is that you go to a doctor to confirm the result of the pregnancy test. While pregnancy tests are highly reliable, it is always best to have the result confirmed.

While there, you can also ask how far along you are, which is important information to have if you are considering an abortion.

And we'll take it from there, okay?

Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 97615

Icon 1 posted      Profile for TravelAddict63     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Okay, thank you. I will do my best to find an affordable doctor here who can speak english and who can help me.
Posts: 4 | Registered: Oct 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Travel: give a shout when you get those results verified. I'm happy to talk through making this choice with you, as well as happy to give you more information about abortion and depression (and pregnancy and depression, for that matter).

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:

Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3

Search Scarleteen