Hello here. I just started to have sex with my girlfriend few months back. Both of us are virgin. When we first had it, we practically had sex everyday that week. After that we were apart from each other few weeks and we meet up twice in a month and we have sex. Sometime we had oral sex and once i got throat ulcer. When i went online to search for the cause of throat ulcer, it partly because of HPV. It got me thinking whether she has HPV or not. She doesn't know whether she has HPV or and we dare not go for checkup because we do not want our parents to know. There is once we want to try unprotected sex, i entered once and i decided not to do it so i took it out. Just once that time. I'm scared that i might have throat cancer or HIV or STD. Is having sex for the first time (both parties) can get HIV or STD?? We stop doing it now after knowing the risks.
Posts: 1 | From: Asia | Registered: Aug 2012
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Hi, Anonymous, welcome to Scarleteen! Although, obviously, the risk of STIs being present is lower when all partners involved have never participated in any kind of sexual activity, it is not something that you can rely on. For one, people all have different ideas of what it means to be a "virgin"! Some people count all kinds of sex in that, while others only count penis-in-vagina intercourse. So one person saying they're a "virgin" can mean something very different to what another person considers to be a "virgin".
The only way to know for sure whether both of you are STI-free is if you BOTH go in and get a FULL STI screening. I know you say that you are worried about your parents finding out -- however, doctors actually aren't allowed to give your parents information about your testing if you are legally an adult.
If you are still a minor, you can still request that your doctor not share your testing information with your parents, and most doctors will respect that (patient-doctor confidentiality might even still be a regulation, it depends on what country/region you're in).
However, if you are still too worried about that, have you tried looking for anonymous-testing clinics in your area? If you give us your postal code, or even just a more specific area (like a city that you live in or close to), we can help you find any possible local sexual health clinics. If you don't want to give that information here on the boards, you can just email it to us via the "contact us" page.
If there really is nowhere in your area that you trust to give you totally confidential STI testing, then we really suggest that you stop any kind of sexual activity for now. Having access to regular STI-testing is a very important part in taking care of one's sexual health, so the best idea is to not participate in any sexual activities until you can properly take care of your health.
Does that all make sense? Let us know if you want help finding any possible sexual health centres near you
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