I let my boyfriend "feel me up" for the first time last night.
It was late and we both had to go home. On our way to my house, we stopped behind an abandoned garage. We hugged. Eventually I decided to let him feel my breasts. Well, I asked him if he wanted to touch me. He said that he did, but he didn't have the time. Despite this, I put his hand inside my shirt. At first I put his hand on my hip. I then moved his hand up further. Eventually I just let go and told him that he could go higher if he wanted. Which he did. This was the first time that any boy had ever touched me like this. I thought maybe he'd just squeeze a bit or something and would be done. However, it went on longer than I expected. It must have only lasted a few minutes, but it felt like an eternity. The whole time I felt like throwing up and crying. I also think he got an erection, which was a little bit terrifying. Eventually I told him that we needed to go. On my way home I felt absolutely terrible. I don't know if I have ever felt so guilty in my life. Today at school I would zone out and just think about it. It made my stomach turn. I just felt so ashamed and embarrassed
So, my question is, how do I deal with the guilt? Is normal to feel so guilty over something that seems so harmless?
Posts: 1 | Registered: Aug 2012
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We all get to feel however we do about anything: there is no right or wrong emotion to have about a situation. It sounds like you might not have been completely ready to have your boyfriend touch your breasts, and that may be a big part of your guilt. Does that sound right?
-------------------- "Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy Posts: 5632 | From: Canada/Australia | Registered: Sep 2004
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