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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Is it normal?

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Author Topic: Is it normal?
Member # 96371

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This is weird for me, because I don't ever feel comfortable enough to ask questions like this. But it's been an issue for a few years and I want to know if it's a normal thing, or if I should be concerned. Or simply why it's happening.
So, I want to know why I can't orgasm. Like, I've asked my mom, my friends mom, my therapist, and none have been able to give me a straight answer. They just tell me to keep masturbating- which I do. Still nothing's happened. I've been sexually active for a few years now, and all of my "endeavors" have ended up great for the person I'm with, just not for me. I've had to learn how to fake it, but it feels mean and it's just a bunch of work. And I want to know if this is a medical issue or if it's not even an issue at all. If this happens with everyone. People keep saying sex is great, but so far... I've yet to see how.

Posts: 1 | From: Somewhere in the Universe | Registered: Jul 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 41699

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Hi SummerLovin05, welcome to scarleteen! Sorry to hear you're having a frustrating time with this. I think the reason nobody was able to give you a "straight" answer is because it's hard to know what's going on with someone else's body. We can only really make educated guesses. To keep on masturbating is the best bet, but since none of them are your doctors they can't actually know if anything medical is going on or not (and we can't really either).

However, keeping on masturbating is only one half of the equation -- have you tried changing up HOW you masturbate? Stimulating different parts of your genitals, and different parts of your body as a whole as well, using vibrators/toys, trying different sexual fantasies while you masturbate, etc? Here are some articles that may be able to help you more:
Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide
The Clitoris, The Vagina, and Orgasm: Feelings and Frameworks
Why Can't I Orgasm?

Posts: 1311 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Dec 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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