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jakej
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What is ment when you say fresh ejaculate?
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Heather
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Meaning, someone just ejaculated. Like, there it is, you saw it come out of your penis or someone else's.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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jakej
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so ejaculate that had been out of the penis for say 2 min in not fresh?
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Heather
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Out of the penis to where? And what are you asking about in regard to this?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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jakej
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well i got a lot of ejaculate on my hands then i gave my gf a back rub for about 2 minutes then i fingered her and im not sure if it was fresh enough to get her pregnant or not
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Heather
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Okay, so for future reference, both to prevent the spread of infections, and just out of common courtesy, you really want to be washing your hands before you put them inside anyone's mouth or genitals, okay?

And that'd be the primary concern with something like this. Pregnancy would not be.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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jakej
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Ok and i never put my hand in her mouth? so would the back rub kill the sperm?
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Heather
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My point is that before our hands go into anyone's orifices, any orifice, we should wash them. Just like we wash our hands before we eat.

Backrubs don't kill sperm cells, per se. The deal is that you having hand some ejaculate on your hands, then taken the time to rub her back in between, then gone into her vagina: that's all too indirect a path for sperm cells to create a pregnancy. They're delicate and need to stay in very specific conditions.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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jakej
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Ok thanks! so for her to be pregnant from sperms being on hands you would have to ejaculate onto your hand and then put it in her vagina within a few seconds? would this be the same for pre ejaculate?
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Heather
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For her to become pregnant, either:
a) you would have to have direct contact between your penis and her genitals and/or
b) direct contact between her genitals and your genital fluids.

Someone becoming pregnant via ejaculate on the hands is simply not a likely scenario no matter how you slice it.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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jakej
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ok why do i hear a lot of people talk about people getting pregnant from fingering?
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Heather
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Who are these people? And are they bouncing a baby on their knee when they are talking about this and swearing up and down that's how they became pregnant? If so, is there something about their life or community that would make it much worse for them to say pregnancy happened by having intercourse?

Really, a LOT of people in the world have had only bad sex ed, incomplete sex ed or none at all. Plenty who have gotten information have gotten it from people who didn't have good information in the first place. So, that's probably the deal here with whoever you're hearing talk about it.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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jakej
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ok thanks! sry i am just stressed and worried. i know i had ejaculate on my hand but i keeping telling my self that nothing could have happened because i gave her a back rub first and that would be too much time for it to still get her pregnant. i also keeping telling myself that after the back rub i didnt notice it still on my hands and if there was enough on my hands to get her pregnant i would know it. does this seem logical?
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Heather
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Again, regardless, this scenario does NOT meet those two conditions I outlined above. There was no direct genital contact AND no direct -- as in, without stops in between -- contact between your fluids and her genitals.

So, relax. And next time, and again, this is mostly about infections and general good manners, just wash your hands before putting them in or on her genitals, okay?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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jakej
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Thank you very much! and thank you for your fast replies!
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Heather
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Happy to help. [Smile]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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jakej
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Ok i am getting nervous again. my gf told me that she started having brown spotting a week before she was do for her period.she said she only noticed when she wiped. and this continued for two weeks and she never got a flow like she normally does, what is this?
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Saffron Raymie
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Brown blood or darker blood is just older blood. It's common to have spotting before a period, and this sounds like your partner's period starting, with a bit of older blood making its way out first.

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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jakej
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But it never started it just did that for two weeks and then stopped.
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Saffron Raymie
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That can happen sometimes, so periods take longer than others, and are much lighter. It sounds like your partner has already had a period.

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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