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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » overcoming jealousy and feeling not good enough

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Author Topic: overcoming jealousy and feeling not good enough
Member # 93262

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i feel like there are plenty of these types of post all the time, but i really want to overcome my problem.

i am very jealous and dont always feel good enough with my girlfriend. probably from her cheating on me early in the relationship, but ever since she has apologized and been good. she also has a drinking problem, and tends to blackout. i just cant forget the cheating. i have problems with her going out due to the fear of other men coming onto her and/or her making a poor decision because of her alcohol blackouts.

i also feel that if i ever break up with her and move on, i will still have these problems. how can i forgive AND forget, if its possible? how can i overcome jealousy and feel confident again?

Posts: 1 | From: Florida | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 36725

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Hi tripledubs, Welcome to Scarleteen!

Have you talked with your girlfriend about how you're feeling? How about how her drinking so much and blacking out has been affecting you and your relationship with her? It's really tough to be with someone when they aren't taking the best care of themselves - and a lot of that comes in with really caring about that person and knowing that something they're doing hurts themself. So if you've not yet talked with her that's step one.

Also, it's sounding like you're trying to work past some of the feelings you're having but really in general just not being able to find ways to get yourself there just yet. Have you talked to someone, like a counselor? If not, it may be helpful in part for your own healing. If so, have you talked with him/her about this?

"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

Posts: 3429 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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