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Author Topic: This is really embarrassing!
abblebaer
Neophyte
Member # 93196

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When I was 12 & 13 I started realizing that my "down there" looked different from other girls'. When I wear a swimming suit or anything even slightly tight, it sticks out. I have a LOT of fat on top of my pubic bone, and I also think the bone is slightly protruded. I see other girls in biknis and stuff and they are "flat" down there. Mine sticks out like a hill. The only comment I've had so far about it was from a friend. She was looking down there and said "Uhhh are you sure you have a vagina?". It's really embaarrassing. I am a chubby girl don't get me wrong. I weigh 175 pounds (I had it when I weighed 160 too though but I don't think it was as bad as now) but I don't look like it. I always get commeneted on how I look like I weigh 155. Even other chubby girls don't have this. [Frown] I know it's normal to have fat on your pubic area (mons pubis) but this does not look normal. It seriously sticks out. It's like the size of a big fist sticking out of someone's pants. I'm only 14 now and I'm already worrying about what my future boyfriend will think and what not. I can't wear bathing suits without constantly being ashamed about it. I'm trying to get my weight down to about 120 (I'm 5'5) by summer time. DO you think it will go away once I lose weight?? My mom has it. [Frown] My half sister (only same dad tho) doesn't. Would lipo even be an option for someone my age if it doesn't end up going away when I lose weight? Sorry for my long post. And sorry for my language but it looks like I have a penis when I wear something tight [Frown]
Posts: 2 | From: Usa | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Having a visible fat pad on the mons is not at all uncommon, even if you're not seeing it on other girls whose groins you're looking at (which is probably a very limited group). It's particularly common when you do weigh more and also when you're younger: during puberty, the mons lifts up over time, so it tends to look flatter years into puberty than it does closer to the start of it.

Liposuction isn't something that would likely be optional or advised by any sound surgeon at your age, period. Surgery is risky, and as well, changing something surgically that may -- and probably is -- be temporary is ethically iffy, and would also be a lot of money for your parent to put out.

If you want to think about losing weight, you want to start by talking with a healthcare provider. That person can also help give you some perspective on this issue.

In the meantime, how about we talk why this is bothering you so much, especially when you have seen others -- like your Mom -- to know this isn't just you? How about we talk about some things you can do to feel like this is less of a big deal?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
abblebaer
Neophyte
Member # 93196

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It's bothering me because I'll never be able to wear cute bikinis or tight pants without being embaressed about it and commented on about it. I really, really hope it goes away when I lose weight.
Posts: 2 | From: Usa | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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The body that you have now is NOT going to be the body you'll have for your whole life, or likely even in another couple of years, both with this issue and your body as a whole. So, I understand how easy it can be to feel like it is, but "never" just doesn't make sense here because bodies change a lot through life, especially at and around the age you're at.

How about we stick with talking about now instead of focusing on the future, which neither you nor I can possibly predict?

For instance, right now, what makes you feel embarrassed about it? You say that you feel embarrassed when you wear tight things, for instance: how about when you only wear things that fit you well and aren't tight?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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