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Author Topic: Age Difference
ZOMBE
Neophyte
Member # 44312

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I have done some searching on the forum and found many topics on this, I just thought I would ask this question for my own conscience. I am a male, currently twenty-one years old and living in Florida. I have had all normal relationships with girls in my age group, being just a few years apart at most! I go to a lot of places where people hang out and talk about cars, which happens to have people of all age groups. I recently met a sixteen year old girl and became flirty with her. Basically it lead to me asking her and and becoming involved in a relationship with her. She is fine with me being five years older then her, but I have been nervous. I made it very clear to her that I am not in this relationship for any sexual advances. I genuinely enjoy her conversation and company, that's all. To be honest, I just love talking with girls and probably would go insane without them in my life. I happen to be a virgin, because I am not just the typical "want to get in every girls pants" kind of guy. My most serious relationship had a girl who wanted to wait until marriage and I was perfectly fine with that. But am I morally wrong for dating her? I have nothing but the utmost respect for this girl. We have been dating since October first and we seem to be getting close, really fast. She seems like she wants to take it to the next level in our relationship... I am fine with that, yet at the same time, I'm not. I don't want her to think that's why I got in this relationship. We have only dated for nine days and don't want her to rush into anything. I want her to have patience and make sure she is all right with our age difference. I want some advice on what people think of my situation... Am I wrong for dating a girl sixteen years old? Should I let her go so she may find somebody her age? I want what's best for her...
Posts: 2 | From: Florida | Registered: Oct 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
atm1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 37835

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Hey Zombe,

I want to give you a heads up that the age of consent in Florida is 18 unless the people are less than three years apart in age. This means that it is illegal (and a felony) for you to have sex with her.

That's definitely something you want to really consider before getting sexual with her.

Now, about your relationship in particular, if you want to wait, why don't you just plainly state that? You might want to wait until she's 18 and it's legal, but even in a completely different situation, 9 days of dating can be quite early to start having sex. Any time your gut is telling you to hold off on sex, that's what you should do.

It doesn't sound to me like you are "morally wrong" for dating her. It sounds like you're making a great effort to give this relationship the thought and concern it needs. BUT, given the legal situation, you may want just be friends until her 18th birthday, or something like that. If you really enjoy her company and she enjoys yours, this might be a good compromise--be friends and see where you guys are in two years.

Posts: 2262 | From: in transition | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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