Donate Now
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Age Difference

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Age Difference
Member # 44312

Icon 1 posted      Profile for ZOMBE     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I have done some searching on the forum and found many topics on this, I just thought I would ask this question for my own conscience. I am a male, currently twenty-one years old and living in Florida. I have had all normal relationships with girls in my age group, being just a few years apart at most! I go to a lot of places where people hang out and talk about cars, which happens to have people of all age groups. I recently met a sixteen year old girl and became flirty with her. Basically it lead to me asking her and and becoming involved in a relationship with her. She is fine with me being five years older then her, but I have been nervous. I made it very clear to her that I am not in this relationship for any sexual advances. I genuinely enjoy her conversation and company, that's all. To be honest, I just love talking with girls and probably would go insane without them in my life. I happen to be a virgin, because I am not just the typical "want to get in every girls pants" kind of guy. My most serious relationship had a girl who wanted to wait until marriage and I was perfectly fine with that. But am I morally wrong for dating her? I have nothing but the utmost respect for this girl. We have been dating since October first and we seem to be getting close, really fast. She seems like she wants to take it to the next level in our relationship... I am fine with that, yet at the same time, I'm not. I don't want her to think that's why I got in this relationship. We have only dated for nine days and don't want her to rush into anything. I want her to have patience and make sure she is all right with our age difference. I want some advice on what people think of my situation... Am I wrong for dating a girl sixteen years old? Should I let her go so she may find somebody her age? I want what's best for her...
Posts: 2 | From: Florida | Registered: Oct 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 37835

Icon 1 posted      Profile for atm1     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hey Zombe,

I want to give you a heads up that the age of consent in Florida is 18 unless the people are less than three years apart in age. This means that it is illegal (and a felony) for you to have sex with her.

That's definitely something you want to really consider before getting sexual with her.

Now, about your relationship in particular, if you want to wait, why don't you just plainly state that? You might want to wait until she's 18 and it's legal, but even in a completely different situation, 9 days of dating can be quite early to start having sex. Any time your gut is telling you to hold off on sex, that's what you should do.

It doesn't sound to me like you are "morally wrong" for dating her. It sounds like you're making a great effort to give this relationship the thought and concern it needs. BUT, given the legal situation, you may want just be friends until her 18th birthday, or something like that. If you really enjoy her company and she enjoys yours, this might be a good compromise--be friends and see where you guys are in two years.

Posts: 2262 | From: in transition | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:

Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3

Search Scarleteen