Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Gender Issues » Gender Identity: Dealing with Friends

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Gender Identity: Dealing with Friends
Member # 31588

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Princemuffin     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
So, here's the deal, I have a gender identity crisis; in which, I want to become male, and I've, so far, come out to three of the most important people in my life: My sister [who is bisexual], a female friend[who is also bisexual], and a male friend [who is straight].

I guess this one's not too hard.

I told my male friend, and he says [not quoted directly but still pretty close] 'I'm okay with that and I support you and everything, but...'
Always with the but. I've come to dislike buts quite a bit...
'I think, if you find the right person, you might even enjoy being the gender that you are'.
[This is the abridged version. It was actually a longer, drawn out speech..]

The conversation displeased me severely, but I'm still a friend of his who will listen and give opinions on his problems without giving comments like his.

Anyhow, if anyone would care to decipher his words differently, I would like to hear some suggestions.
Well, suggestions other than my assumption of him saying my problem is downright irrational.


[ 11-22-2006, 10:17 PM: Message edited by: Princemuffin ]

"The God I know is not some narrow-minded conservative..."

Posts: 1 | From: TN | Registered: Nov 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I don't know that what he said is irrational so much as... predictable.

In other words, is a typical thing people say about any sort of differences when it comes to either gender or orientation. Heck, even feminist women are often told that once they find the right man, things will all be better, etc.

So, you have a friend who just doesn't get it right now. That's always a bummer, but on the other hand, you've got at least two other people who are supportive. That's a pretty big deal, since a lot of transpeople have exactly no one who is.

I say for now, lean on those people for support, and accept that for right now, your other friend just isn't getting it.

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

Quick Reply

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins

Post New Topic  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:

Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3