That is INCREDIBLY sad. I don't even have words for this one. The sheer double-faced notion that the school would turn a blind eye, as it were, on his practices for a full year, but then turn him away when he attempted to bring it to a formal event? OUCH. Clearly, his decision to wear a dress was based on gender, not on a pompus desire to cause disruption.
The whole notion is gender discrimination in more than one way. Not only does the school refuse to recognize his unorthodox gender variation, but I will bet you one million dollars that the school has NO policy forbidding girls to wear trousers, and that if a female had showed up in a tuxedo, they would have let her in without question.
I empathise in a large way in-so-far as missing the "one and only prom". My date and I were turned away from prom as well, though for different reasons. It's not a life-devistating event, but it IS something that you carry a great deal of bitterness over, especially when your fellow peers recite the wonderful memories that they had while you wonder what it even looked like beyond the doors.
Attacking the school legally over not being let into his prom may seem trivial, but if only in the sense of giving transgender practices some exposure and trying to knock some sense of obligation towards tollarance into his school... it might be somewhat effective. If nothing else, they might not turn away the next boy in a dress because they don't want to deal with the legal drama.
Unfortunately, he's pretty much just gotten a taste of what he will be experiencing for the rest of his life if he decides that these practices are a part of his identity that he does not feel he can or wants to relinquish. Showing up for his prom in a dress was a bold and self-confident move: I hope some of his peers at least gave him kudos for it.
Showing up for his prom in a dress was a bold and self-confident move: I hope some of his peers at least gave him kudos for it.
I second that. Also, showing up at school every day dressed as a girl must have taken a lot of guts, too, especially if this is the kind of school that enforces such haphazard gender rules.
Makes me really sad to hear that. Especially because it seems so pointless to me. For the first two years of HS, I went to a school that was perfectly cool with this sort of thing. A male friend of mine came to a dance in a dress once and no one lost a word about it. We had two same-sex couples attend our Prom, as well. And I have no idea why any of this constitutes a reason for making such a fuss.
At the very least, this guy seems to have a very supportive mother and if he's survived a year at that school dressed up, he must have a few supportive friends there, as well. Life's gonna be tough for him, but a good support system is already more than most in his position have.
-------------------- Johanna Scarleteen Volunteer
"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005
| IP: Logged |
Ugh I think that's horrible. I feel soo bad for him. It's one of the most important nights of his life, and they try to screw it up. And they let him do this all year. Talk about double- standards?! Regoddess, if you don't mind me asking...why were you turned away at prom? Was it a similar incident?
Posts: 4 | From: somewhere secret | Registered: Aug 2006
| IP: Logged |
Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998
Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.