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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » penetration doesn't work

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Author Topic: penetration doesn't work
fluorite
Activist
Member # 109610

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Hi. Whenever I try and put anything into my vagina I can't. It hurts too much. I have tried inserting tampons over the past 8 or so years at various times, can't do it. I can't insert my own fingers during masturbation even a little bit, even if I'm really aroused. I tried to get a pap smear once but it hurt so much the gynecologist stopped before she had the speculum in. She also said everything looked normal. A couple of times my ex tried to insert her fingers, too, but that didn't work either. I know one doesn't need penetration to have sex, but I would like it to be a thing that's possible. Additionally I would like to be able to use a cup during my period because pads are expensive and I get excema frequently from them. any suggestions as to what I can do?
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Sam W
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 108189

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Hi Fluorite,

Sorry to hear you're feeling frustrated with this situation. You mention seeing an OB-GYN. Have you discussed the penetration difficulties with them? If so, did they have any thoughts?

If you haven't taken a look yet, this article might be a good place to start answering your question:
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/i_cannot_insert_anything_into_my_vagina_what_should_i_do

[ 02-17-2014, 07:43 PM: Message edited by: Sam W ]

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fluorite
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Member # 109610

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They didn't have any thoughts other than 'everything looks normal'. This was a few years ago though. To be honest I am scared to see another OB-GYN because I'm afraid they would go through with a pap smear even if I was in severe pain (I've had other experiences with doctors telling me that I was not feeling pain when in fact I was) and additionally I've experienced sexual abuse since then, so the idea of being naked in front of anybody is terrifying. (the penetration issue has been there since before the abuse though so while that may not be helping anything it also wasn't the original cause of anything. I will look at that article.
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Sam W
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 108189

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Hopefully, the article will give you some good starting points to try in terms of tampons or cups.

I can see why you are reticent to seek out further medical treatment, given those experiences. Have you gotten any counseling or other support to help you with recovering from the sexual abuse that occurred?

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