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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » I want to be more charismatic/confident but I'm really shy

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Author Topic: I want to be more charismatic/confident but I'm really shy
fierceturtle
Neophyte
Member # 108194

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I'm going to turn sixteen really soon, and lately, I've been really wanting to get into a relationship. We just moved so I'm going to go to a completely new school where nobody knows me.

The problem is that I've always had insecurity issues and I'm very shy and introverted. When I was eleven and twelve, I received negative comments about my looks from my friends. Although I was chubbier then than I am now, those things have stuck with me. Obesity is genetic in my family but I wouldn't necessarily classify myself as 'overweight' or even 'chubby', but I am definitely not skinny.

Sometimes I feel like I could rock the world with the way I look and sometimes I can't even stand looking at myself in the mirror. I know that guys are attracted to girls who are confident, even if they aren't the prettiest in the world. So I genuinely want to change myself for the better, not because my friends want me to, but because I want to.

I feel like I could be a great leader with my thoughts and opinions if I weren't so shy, so I don't want to learn how to be more extroverted so I can get into a relationship. Are there any tips you could give me?

Thanks so much! [Smile]

Posts: 7 | From: USA | Registered: Aug 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
September
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 25425

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Moving and going to a new school can be an awesome way to try out new sides of yourself. It sounds like you are really excited about that opportunity, so go you! A positive attitude is an important part of confidence.

To feel confident, it helps to focus on things you like about yourself, and things you are good at. Have you tried making a list of things that you like about yourself? An aspect of your body that you really like, a personality trait that you think kicks ***?

Another good idea would be to get involved in activities that you enjoy. It's easier to be extroverted and connect with people when you are all engaging in activity together that you like. And the beginning of the schoolyear is a great time to join a club or sports team.

I wish you the best of luck! [Smile]

--------------------
Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
fierceturtle
Neophyte
Member # 108194

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Thanks so much! I made a list, but I would like to make it bigger [Smile]
Posts: 7 | From: USA | Registered: Aug 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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