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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » why is that?

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Author Topic: why is that?
Member # 107628

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My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 weeks and when we made out the first time. It was amazing. The second time also amazing. But after we make out , I always feel sick to my stomach and I feel like throwing up. Here's my question. Why is it after every make out session I feel this way and feel guilty afterwards?
Posts: 8 | From: Florida | Registered: Jun 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 107716

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Hi Jazzygirl! [Smile]

Sometimes when we don't feel ready or comfortable doing something, anxiety - and guilt - can kick in. Not because you are doing something wrong, but because you are doing something you don't feel completely comfortable with.

Reading through your previous post I see this is not the first time you feel like this. I am wondering if you have talked with your boyfriend about how are you feeling after these making out sessions? Have you both talked about boundaries, limits, and what do you both want and don't want to happen yet?

"Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it " (...'cause no one else will) -Gandhi-

Posts: 420 | From: Somewhere over the rainbow* | Registered: Jun 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Well, this is one of those where you are really going to have to figure that out for yourself.

To get started on that, you can look at a few things that are typical causes of people feeling like this:

• Your history in terms of how you were raised per sexuality, especially if you have gotten messages about any kind of sexual activity, including kissing, being bad or wrong
• How you feel about the relationship this is happening within
• Your own ideas about sex and sexuality, and how okay you feel it is or is not

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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