Donate Now
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » Troubles with the first time

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Troubles with the first time
whathappensinspain
Neophyte
Member # 95344

Icon 13 posted      Profile for whathappensinspain     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
My boyfriend and I have tried having sex for a couple of times (it's my first time ever), and I say try because so far there hasn't been an actual penetration, I think... Every time we try my vagina just won't open enough for his penis to enter completely or his penis is not hard enough or he doesn't put it in the right place... Anyway, I don't know what to do because I think we both have been really aroused but it just won't happen, it's really frustrating.

There's another problem, one time when I think he was half in, the condom slipped out of his penis, when I noticed I panicked of course, but it was too late and there was definetely penis-vagina contact... So after that I am really paranoid and everytime we try do it I don't want to let go of the condom to prevent it from slipping out, this is an obvious problem because then my hand gets in the way, but I really really don't want it to slip again!!

So I'm totally losing hope here I would really love some advice, is the first time always this hard? Is it weird that we have tried for two nights and still nothing?? [Confused]

Posts: 15 | From: Spain | Registered: Mar 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
whathappensinspain
Neophyte
Member # 95344

Icon 1 posted      Profile for whathappensinspain     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Also sorry if this is not the right thread, I wasn't sure where this situation fits in
Posts: 15 | From: Spain | Registered: Mar 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Have you ever seen a toddler or infant start to learn to walk?

If so, you know that they tend to fall on their faces a LOT of times before they even start to get a handle on it. And that they're not experts at walking for a long time after.

People often have the idea sex is something that 'works" right from the start, when really, it's just like learning to walk. We learn as we go, we flub it a bunch of times, and later on down the road when we look back, we often realize that even when we thought we had it down to an art form, we were still only just beginning.

So, you've both been super-excited at the same time, where he's got an erection and he's keeping it, and you're aroused enough that you know -- from other sexual activities before trying intercourse -- that your vulva is responding to that arousal, and anything in it feels good, etc?

Are you saying the condom slipped off? If so, is he using a size that's right for him? have you two talked about that?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68255 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
whathappensinspain
Neophyte
Member # 95344

Icon 1 posted      Profile for whathappensinspain     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
[Smile] I love the metaphor, should I just be more patient then, I'll do that, the good thing is that he is really supportive, and he keeps telling me that I shouldn't worry, that we'll get there eventually, and the important part is that we both enjoy... So good, I'll just keep trying I guess.

And yeah the condom slipped off! He was not wearing it anymore when I looked down, and I think it IS the right size, I mean it covers all of his penis, but you recommend talking about it, specifically about what? about the event of the condom slipping or about the right size of the condom

Posts: 15 | From: Spain | Registered: Mar 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
For sure, it's great your partner gets that so long as you two are enjoying each other, it's all good. Now sounds like you yourself need to get on board with that! [Smile]

I asked about the condoms because if a lot of slippage is happening, then for sure, a slip-off is more likely, which you obviously want to avoid. If a condom is too big or too small, that's more likely to happen.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68255 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3