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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » Questioning: Peer Support

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Author Topic: Questioning: Peer Support
Djuna
Activist
Member # 29269

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This is one of a few threads we've added to help those of you who are often dealing with similar issues -- or aren't, but are members of this one broad group of sexual orientation or gender identity and want to connect, even in places you're not the same -- but perhaps not seeing each other in one place on the boards to know you can connect and talk together. We keep seeing some users who it seems like would SO benefit from talking together, but due to the business of the boards, probably don't realize are here to talk to.

This one is for anyone who is or feels they are questioning their orientation or gender identity in some way.

IMPORTANT: What this thread is NOT for is anyone who does not feel or identify in those ways, but who is curious about people who do and wants to interview them in any way to satisfy their curiosity. This is a peer support thread for people who are questioning their own orientation or identity. Thanks!

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“In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I don’t know what I am. I don’t know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.”

Posts: 1269 | From: London, UK | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Kikabella
Neophyte
Member # 70812

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Hi [Smile]

I'm questioning my sexual orientation. I definitely like males, but I'm currently unsure if I am attracted to females as well. I'm only 14, so it could just be curiousity or hormones. My friend recently came out as bisexual and I wonder if I am the same.

I haven't told anyone I'm "questioning" at this point other than a select few of my closest friends who are open-minded, trustworthy and non-judgemental. My parents don't believe in bisexuality, they think that it's just an "excuse" to be "half straight". If I eventaully do decide I'm bisexual, I'm not sure how to tell my parents without them trying to convince me I'm either straight or lesbian.

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~Kiki

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The Confused One
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Member # 48587

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I'm questioning too. I'm not sure either, if this is just my hormones or curiosity. But well, I do wonder if being with a girl would feel nice. Even more confusing for me is that I've been in a girls school since 7 years old, so it could also just be me feeling more comfortable around girls.

Many know I'm questioning, but most of them have no idea what questioning even means LOL. They think theres only Straight, Bi or Les/Gay. I don't know what my dad thinks, but I know my mum only believes in straight orientations. She told me lesbians worship Satan... or something along those lines ._. That was a few years ago. So if I DO become Bi, I guess my parents will never know lol

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Wheeeeeeee!

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alwaysandalways
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Member # 72052

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Hi my name is Maybeth and i'm 13 Sometimes I want to be a boy sometimes I want to be a girl. I believe I am bisexual. I a little confused
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Djuna
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Member # 29269

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Hi Maybeth! I identify as pansexual and genderqueer, but I think I definitely question those too all the time. If you're confused, here's some articles I know were really useful for me when I first started questioning gender and sexual orientation.

The Bees and...the Bees: A Homosexuality and Bisexuality Primer
Bi the Dozen: A Bisexuality Quiz
Genderpalooza! A Sex & Gender Primer

And of course, if you want to talk through any of your feelings, that's what this space is for. [Smile]

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“In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I don’t know what I am. I don’t know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.”

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sunnyday
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Member # 45219

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I'm questioning whether or not I'm bi....I go back and forth....does it matter how many people of the same sex one has been attracted to?
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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quote:
does it matter how many people of the same sex one has been attracted to?
I'm not sure quite what you mean by that, because how many people of any group people have been attracted to is going to vary so much.

Some people think being bisexual means that a person has to be attracted to two genders or sexes of people in a 50/50 way, if that's what you mean. And that is the experience of some bisexual people. Others find -- in a lifetime, or at a given time of life -- that they experience attraction in a different proportion.

Ultimately, all being bisexual (or pansexual or queer, when that's how someone is using queer) usually means is that a person feels attraction to more than one sex/gender, not only or primarily to one.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Haleylynn
Neophyte
Member # 47356

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I am questioning too. I sometimes wonder if life would be easier w/o labels, until someone asks me 'what' I am. I am fluid. I have fluctuated over the years. I went from liking mostly boys at 14 to having one crush on a boy in two years at 18, and fantasizing about women. I find that my crushes on women are fairly superficial, based on appearance or sexually charged. I'm not sure how other crushes on guys will be, but I feel comfortable with this particular male, more than ever before. I also wonder how much or if gender stereotypes contribute to where a person lies on the trans spectrum, as I feel like I identify somewhere along it. Can sexuality come in phases? Can you change as you grow?
Posts: 25 | From: Kansas, USA | Registered: Jun 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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