Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » Orientation so fluid it changes weekly

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Orientation so fluid it changes weekly
ruddy_duck
Neophyte
Member # 48014

Icon 5 posted      Profile for ruddy_duck     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I find that during certain times during my cycle, I find my attractions change. Around mid-cycle, I find that I'm more attracted to men, but around the beginning of my cycle, I want to be with a woman. It's really confusing! I go with "queer" for right now, basically because I don't know what to call myself. What gives? Have any other female-bodied individuals experienced this?

--------------------
"To free yourself is to exist."
-Augusto Boal

Posts: 13 | From: The Midwest | Registered: Jul 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Well, either way, I hear you expressing that you are capable of being attracted to men or women. So, that sounds a lot like bisexuality or pansexuality to me, or just plain "queer" if that feels better to you.

Can't say as a queer person I've ever noticed a pattern like that myself, but as a sexuality geek, that's pretty fascinating to me! [Smile]

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
ruddy_duck
Neophyte
Member # 48014

Icon 1 posted      Profile for ruddy_duck     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Haha, thanks [Smile]

I guess I just find that I have trouble accepting it, you know? I actually have a bit of a fear of being straight because I don't want to get funneled into being heteronormative, and I'm aware of that bias and so I don't trust in my queerness, especially because it can be a little...flaky, cycle-wise? [Razz] I know that I'm generally more sexually attracted to men and romantically attracted to women, and that's something I have trouble processing.

It's uncomfortable and tough and it hurts, but I think I just need to keep reminding myself that my sexuality is legit, and maybe find some people who feel similar to me.

--------------------
"To free yourself is to exist."
-Augusto Boal

Posts: 13 | From: The Midwest | Registered: Jul 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
bump on a log
Activist
Member # 60751

Icon 1 posted      Profile for bump on a log     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Haven't noticed this myself, but I've certainly heard female-bodied people say that they are attracted to one type of man at one point in their cycle and to another type at another point, or that their feelings of attraction are different in kind, not only in degree, at different points in the cycle. So it kind of makes sense that as a female-bodied bisexual person you would have that shift.
Posts: 170 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Karybu
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 20094

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Karybu     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I haven't noticed any correlation between my attractions and my cycle, but I do definitely have periods of time where I'm more attracted to one gender over others. (Possibly that's why it took so long for me to figure out my own orientation - I've always been attracted to men pretty consistently, but my attraction to women fluctuates a LOT. Sometimes it's really strong, other times it's barely there.)

--------------------
"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

Posts: 5799 | From: Canada/Australia | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lizerta
Neophyte
Member # 88286

Icon 1 posted      Profile for lizerta     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I know how you feel. I haven't payed attention to the specific weeks much, but my sexuality definitely changes with my cycle. I know that while I'm on I'm attracted to guys, and then, the week after I like women. It's so odd, and it makes it really confusing. I've gone with "not straight" for now.

--------------------
"A real voyage of discovery consists
not of seeking new landscapes
but of seeing through new eyes."
- Marcel Proust

Posts: 1 | Registered: Nov 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
moonlight bouncing off water
Peer Ambassador
Member # 44338

Icon 1 posted      Profile for moonlight bouncing off water     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I haven't experienced being more attracted to men versus women throughout my cycle. I have, however noticed that the coming of my period wildly influences my sex drive.

Either of those things could possibly be occurring or be influenced by the fact that hormone levels are constantly changing throughout one's cycle. It could also be something altogether different.

--------------------
~moonlight

I am ME and that is the only label I need.

Posts: 864 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Oct 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lovelearnsing
Neophyte
Member # 50226

Icon 10 posted      Profile for lovelearnsing     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I have noticed the same thing. I am emotionally and physically attracted to both men and women, but I seem to go through phases. Sometimes I am only interested in men, sometimes only women, and most of the time somewhere in between. It definitely seems to correlate with my cycles, but I have been so preoccupied with studying and work that I haven't really tried to see what correlation there is if there is one. That is so interesting to see that someone else has experienced that too.

As for what to call yourself. I have considered myself bisexual because it feels like the best explanation for me, but queer, fluid, etc. Whatever feels more comfortable for you.

Posts: 3 | From: USA | Registered: Nov 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ohana626
Activist
Member # 56775

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Ohana626     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by ruddy_duck:
Haha, thanks [Smile]

I guess I just find that I have trouble accepting it, you know? I actually have a bit of a fear of being straight because I don't want to get funneled into being heteronormative, and I'm aware of that bias and so I don't trust in my queerness, especially because it can be a little...flaky, cycle-wise? [Razz] I know that I'm generally more sexually attracted to men and romantically attracted to women, and that's something I have trouble processing.

It's uncomfortable and tough and it hurts, but I think I just need to keep reminding myself that my sexuality is legit, and maybe find some people who feel similar to me.

Hey there duck, I get exactly what you mean. I'm in a similar boat myself, especially with the not wanting to be straight and knowing that that feeling might mean that you're..for lack of a better term..."faking" your woman-liking feelings. (That was what you meant right? sorry if I misinterpreted.) I also am the same way with being sexually attracted to men and romantically attracted to women, although within the past few days my feelings have begun to change a little in that I feel that the woman's body is becoming more attractive to me...but again, that feeling fluctuates, although if it's with my cycle or not I'm not sure.

I know that personally, I'm not comfortable just letting my feelings be, as in I'd rather have something to define me, not to use to tell others, but so I understand myself well you know? So I'm not sure what you are, or me either, especially because of the biased feeling and worrying that that is interfering with knowing what my real orientation is (especially since I only started having bisexual feelings about a year and a half ago)

Posts: 187 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3