Donate Now
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » I thought I was a lesbian, but now I'm not so sure.

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: I thought I was a lesbian, but now I'm not so sure.
graffitionyourbody
Neophyte
Member # 47384

Icon 5 posted      Profile for graffitionyourbody     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Okay, so for the past 2 years I've identified as a lesbian. I've only been attracted to females, and I've been pretty comfortable with that. But now I'm starting to question it.

I'm starting to think about guys (and, to be frank, guy parts).I don't feel like I would actually want to have sex with a guy though, that's the thing. These thoughts are pretty much unwanted.

To confuse things further, I have OCD. With it comes unwanted sexual thoughts. Could these be a part of that? I don't think I actually like guys. There are guys I think are attractive, but I wouldn't want to sleep with them.

I feel like I'm still a lesbian, but I'm just confused as to what is going on...

Posts: 19 | From: Washington, DC. | Registered: Jun 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mma
Activist
Member # 47280

Icon 1 posted      Profile for mma     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
How do *you* feel about the OCD playing a part in this?

I know for *my* part, I can get something into my head that I don't like and can't get it out and I'm not even diagnosed with OCD.

Sometimes I think about female parts or notice that a particular woman is beautiful and wonder if I were to ever be single, would I be open to being in an intimate relationship with a woman. Then I remember that I really just have a large academic interest in human sexuality in general. So I just sort of acknowledge that that's an interesting thought and let it pass by. A lot of times when I spend a lot of mental energy trying to get rid of something I don't want to think about, the more firmly entrenched it becomes. Sort of like when a car gets stuck in the mud or snow... the more you spin your tires, the more deeply you get mired!

--------------------
http://www.safeplace.org

1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
http://www.ndvh.org

Posts: 116 | From: Texas | Registered: May 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mizchastain
Activist
Member # 32224

Icon 1 posted      Profile for mizchastain     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Unwanted and unappealing sexual thoughts are a problem I used to have a lot (doctor told me I don't have OCD, but I do have Aspergers' and tendencies to anxiety and depression, which are apparently often associated with OCD), so it could be to do with your OCD - it's a pretty common symptom. On the other hand, I've heard it's not unknown for people to enjoy fantasising about a gender they wouldn't be interested in having sex with in real life, though I don't really know how common that is. Can't really be of any more help, but I thought I could add my 2 cents on this.
Posts: 461 | From: UK | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Storms
Neophyte
Member # 48006

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Storms     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I am actually in a very similar position right now. I knew I liked women when I was 12, considered myself a lesbian when I was 13, and am now 19. About a year ago I noticed that men would start entering into my fantasies while masturbating, but then when I stop and ask myself if that's something I would actually want in real life, I don't think it is. In my fantasies I find the idea of intercourse with men appealing, but I would never want to touch, kiss, or do anything else of a sexual or intimate nature with a man. I've only ever been truly attracted to women (older women, specifically), but I guess I'm just now questioning how much of a lesbian I actually am.

--------------------
Dreams unwind --- love's a state of mind.

Posts: 1 | From: New York, NY | Registered: Jul 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.
UBB Code™ Images not permitted.
Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3