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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » Help please... Ugh, mixed messages and BFF's

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Author Topic: Help please... Ugh, mixed messages and BFF's
Trumpet Master
Neophyte
Member # 47863

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Okay here goes it.... My best friend says she is straight. I am a lesbian and have aknowlaged so for a while now. I came out to her and most of my friends two years ago. They were all cool with it and everything... But recently my friend has benn making little comments here and there that sound like come-ons. She also like leans on my shoulder and couply things like that. Oh yeah, I also have a HUGE crush on her!! And I would really like to be with her but she says she is straight.... So I am really confused!! I don't know what to do! [Frown] [Confused] Please help me!

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I say you love who you love. Lust over who you lust over. And are happy with who you are happy with. Everything inbetween doesn't matter!!!

Posts: 29 | From: United States of America | Registered: Jul 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
atm1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 37835

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Have you sat down and asked her about this?

You could simply say "I've noticed a recent change--you seem to be flirting with me. What's up with that?" and see what she says.

If she says that she's just joking around, you might want to ask her to stop it. However, if she says she might be interested, you can go from there.

Posts: 2262 | From: in transition | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Trumpet Master
Neophyte
Member # 47863

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I have tried to talk to her about it but she just waves me off and acts like I didn't mention it. She is also doing this in school and is making people start rumours about us, and has people asking about my sexuality. Which I am not ready to come out got the whole school yet. It also one day ended up in one of my other friends getting punched in the face for standng up to someone who was making fun of us and calling us demeaning names. I have great friends. But school has ended recently so I have time now to ask her about it and hopefully get an answer.

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I say you love who you love. Lust over who you lust over. And are happy with who you are happy with. Everything inbetween doesn't matter!!!

Posts: 29 | From: United States of America | Registered: Jul 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
atm1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 37835

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Okay, well, if she is saying things that are putting you at risk of bullying or violence, I would strongly encourage you to make it clear to her that you do NOT want to be out except to your friends.

Outing people when they don't want to be outed is very serious business, and ANY ally should understand that that is completely and totally unacceptable.

If you like us to look for resources that you can give her that explain that put better, just let us know.

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Trumpet Master
Neophyte
Member # 47863

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No I am fine. Thanks for the advice! [Smile]

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I say you love who you love. Lust over who you lust over. And are happy with who you are happy with. Everything inbetween doesn't matter!!!

Posts: 29 | From: United States of America | Registered: Jul 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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