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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » Bisexuality feeling "real"

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Author Topic: Bisexuality feeling "real"
Member # 96002

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Has anyone else had the problem where they don't feel like they're "really" bi(or any other orientation) until they tell someone/come out?

For me, this is rather new; I've suspected that I'm bi for years, but I only recently felt comfortable exploring that side of me and coming out to myself. So just last week, I decided to re-identify myself as bisexual. I've yet to tell anyone in my life in person, or with my online friends(I'm heavily involved in fandom, and a large part of that involvement is why I finally felt comfortable enough to deal with my bisexuality). I feel more comfortable telling them, but I'm not sure how I want to bring it up, yet. I was with my sister(the most tolerant member of my family) the other day, and I really wanted to tell her, but I didn't know how to bring it up, so I just didn't. That disappointed me. Is that a normal feeling? I know I'm *VERY* new to all this, so it could just be my over-eager self wanting to shout my happiness from the hills, y'know? And I feel different; it's like I'm coming to terms with the fact that I like girls too, and that's totally okay. In the past, I've caught myself checking out other women and I used to do just that; catch myself and stop. But I feel like now I can embrace that. Ironically enough, one of my worries about identifying as bi was letting all this out and then having to deal with "slipping" and then having to explain why I just made a comment about liking girls...but now, it doesn't even bother me.
I'm just rambling, now. See? Eager.

It just feels weird to be so eager to tell people because I'm a firm believer that sexuality is fluid and that how you identify and what you do when it comes to sex is nobody else's business. And I'm not 100% sure that further down the road I won't re-evaluate myself and decide that another orientation better how I am.

I'm 16, but I've always felt confident about everything, including my sexuality(once I knew what sex was, that is), and I'm very independent(i.e. I do what I want, regardless of social norms/religious ~rules~/what others want me to do) in addition to being private and typically a loner, so it's a very strange feeling for me to be this way, to want to tell everyone, even the ones who might judge me. I feel like a newborn foal, tottering around and eager for everything.

Posts: 37 | From: Texas | Registered: Jun 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 33376

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thats how i feel now but its only until a few months ago i could do so and say so (when before i couldn't)
Posts: 94 | From: london | Registered: Apr 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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