Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » How long do you think you should wait before deciding your sexuality?

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: How long do you think you should wait before deciding your sexuality?
Member # 8593

Icon 2 posted      Profile for saith166     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Here's a question I've been thinking about. How long does it take to be sure about your sexual orientation? 6 months? a couple of years? Should you wait and see if anything changes? I'd be interested in hearing what people think about this.
Posts: 8 | From: narberth, PA, USA | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 6475

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Sh!mmeR!ng*staR     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
first off, you don't "decide" your sexuality. it just sort of... happens, i guess. like it's realized. personally, i think most people realize their sexuality in their teenage years, probably because of all the hormones.

Prosperity that
the golden Muses
gave me was no
delusion: dead, I
won't be forgotten

Posts: 97 | From: Wisconsin | Registered: Jan 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 2748

Icon 1 posted      Profile for DrQuack5     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I think I sort of decided. I waited probably about ... a year or so before I told anyone.
Posts: 290 | From: Minneapolis | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 226

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Dzuunmod     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Some people think that it's possible to decide, some people don't. (And even if it is possible, who cares? Conservatives usually use that as ammunition to claim that the "homosexual lifestyle" or whatever, should be cleaned up. If it's possible to choose, and I choose to be gay, straight or bi, big deal. It's none of their damn business anyway.)

As for what the right time to *decide* is, why do you ever need to decide? If you feel like being bisexual during your teens, then do it! But don't let that stop you from being straight when you're 30, and gay when you're 52, if that's how you feel at those particular moments in life.

There aren't any rules about when you should definitely cast your sexuality in stone. If anyone tells you differently, don't buy into it. Be what you are, and if that means being attracted to different people at different times in your life, there's no problem with that!

Posts: 1515 | From: Montreal, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 8524

Icon 12 posted      Profile for spiritual_anorexia     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
well, it took me 2 years to come to grips with the fact that I am bisexual. but then even about a year after I came out about that I decided I was a lesbian. But of course, I knew a girl who went from strait to bisexual, to lesbian in 3 days. It just depends on your mentality I guess. Um...if you're strait now or bi curious just go with the flow of being bisexual, but if a little later on, say 3 months later on you decide you completely don't like men or women (not exactly sure what sex you are) then label yourself as completely gay or lesbian. It's that simple. But as long as your happy, then we're all good to go.

Posts: 13 | From: Caldwell, Idaho, USA | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 8684

Icon 1 posted      Profile for fly_little_wing     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I don't think you need a certain about of time to realize your sexuality. It usually just comes to you.
Take me for example.
The thought of me being anything other than straight had never entered my mind for my whole life. Then back in March, a combination of a few events caused me to think about it. It only took me a couple months to realize where I stood in terms of my sexuality, and now I'm content with it.
If it takes you a few weeks or months, that's fine. But if it takes you a couple years, or your whole life, that's alright too! Realizing your sexuality isn't something that should be rushed. But you'll know when your sure where you're at.

Posts: 41 | From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:

Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3