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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » Orientation = Identity?

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Author Topic: Orientation = Identity?
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5640

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This idea came to me while I was watching an episode of The Real World. On the show, there is a male character who decided to with-hold his sexual orientation from the others because he didn't want them to automatically equate him with being the token "gay guy." My question is that do you find that when you disclose your sexuality, does it seem to often become the defining characteristic of your personality?

Or, do you identify yourself as it? What I'm trying to say is, do you let being [insert alternative sexuality here] define who you are?

I personally see this quite often, whie I haven't fully disclosed my bisexuality, in friends of mine who have told others that they [sexuality] often find themselves as suddenly becoming a gay person, all of the time -- even when sex or anything utterly romantic isn't an issue. This is one of the reasons that I haven't been so open, the other being that I truly hate labels. I'm bisexual, yes, but that isn't who I am. It's a part of who I am, but I don't want it to be who or what I am.

Let's hear from all of you, whether your bi, straight, gay, etc.

(whew, that's quite a rant.... I hope it isn't too confusing to understand )
[edited for clarity]
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[This message has been edited by Dude_who_writes (edited 01-24-2002).]

Posts: 712 | From: Michigan, US | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5375

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No, my orientation and my identity are not interchangable. This point was reinforced today when I came out to a friend of mine. Of three years. As we were talking about girls. Again. I guess I assume that people know more than I should. (Three years without picking up on this?! I wasn't hiding it - I just never bothered to come out and said it.)

I've never really gotten the impression that anyone regards me as simply a sexuality rather than the complex, multi-faceted person that I am. I certainly think of myself as more than bi.

There is a time and a place for everything.

Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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