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Author Topic: How do I let her know I'm interested?
Burdened with glorious booty
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Hi. [Big Grin] Having been at university for a month now, I've met plenty of new and awesome people. Mostly guys, but so far I have no interest in them. But there is this girl...

My ideas on my identity have been up and down, and I've been changing labels like no one's business, and finding out that I really, REALLY like this girl didn't make things at all easier for me. Before I met this girl, I was so sure that me liking a girl enough to want a relationship with her - and her wanting to be in a relationship with me - was such an unlikely situation that mentioning that I like girls just never seemed relevant. I knew, romantically, who I was - I liked girls, kinda-sorta-maybe, but I preferred guys a lot more. This girl honestly came along and just blew all that out of the water.

She's amazing. She's beautiful, she's smart, she's brave and headstrong and honest and all these things that make me wish I was like her, and make me incredulous and overly grateful at the fact that she even talks to me at all. Her hair's outrageously short and pink, she's had six tattoos done within the past year (all of them legal), she asks before she lights up a cigarette and she gets really upset if she blows it in your face, and I've never known anyone so lovely in all my life. It's not love, not yet, but the thought of her gives me butterflies.

So this past month, I realised I had to take the fact that I'm somewhere between being bi and straight and actually do something with it. So recently, having seen the word around Scarleteen and realising that it actually fits me (technically, since me and my ex are in a Romantic Friendship, I'm poly as well as everything else), I've been jokingly calling myself "Polyqueergenderqueer". So I've been thinking "Yes! I admit, I like girls!...But how is she going to know that?"

Because she doesn't know any of this. She herself is an out and proud lesbian - one of her tattoos is about this fact - so I know that it's reasonable to think that MAYBE she could be interested in me. But on the outside, I appear to be straight. I have no problem admitting when boys are good looking, I've mentioned my ex (although I didn't mention his gender), and I talked to her about this male friend of mine who might fancy me. I'm afraid that, if she IS interested in me, then I might be communicating to her accidentally that I'm 100% straight and not interested in her. It doesn't help that I have AS and I've admitted to her that there are aspects of human behaviour that I either don't understand or have trouble interpreting, so even if she was interested in me, the only way she could ever let me know is to spell it out for me. Plus, I've not known her for that long, so I wouldn't want to say anything NOW, but I'm worried that she'd find someone else (or has already found someone else), and that I'll get left behind.

My vague plan right now is to come out to her as being queer - since I've only told a few people, she'd likely be glad I told her. But that way, it'd at least be out there that I COULD be interested. Does that sound like a good idea? And if she accepts that, how can I imply any kind of interest without coming across as a creeper or over-eager?

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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You know, I don't think that simply telling her -- or anyone -- that you like them and would like to get to know them more if they feel the same way is creepy or over-eager.

I also think that if dating her is what you're interested in, then it serves you best to make that interest clear.

Coming out to someone doesn't really do that. Especially, IMO, when we're someone who is out and has been out, we often have others come and come out to us because they figure we're safe people to do that with. I can't speak for this girl, but I'd never take someone coming out to me as a gesture of a romantic interest in me. I hear you saying it's a gesture that you could be interested, but I don't think that will tend to translate to someone else the way you're thinking, personally.

So, how about just asking her out instead?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Burdened with glorious booty
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With the whole "coming out" thing, I think my idea was that it would demonstrate how much I trust her - and I genuinely do trust her, I've been able to trust her with the fact that I have AS and I can trust her with this. Plus it shows that, if she does fancy me now (not that I'm counting on that, just that it's always a possibility), then she'd know that it's possible that I'd like her back.

I'm still kind of confused about all of this. I mean, it's always been difficult for me trying to navigate romance, and it doesn't help that I HAVE been turned down on the basis that I was too forward and creeping them out. And I've admitted only to a very select few that I like girls, so this isn't going to be so easy for me.

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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So, you've heard that simply asking someone out -- a la "Hey, could we go hang out and have coffee sometime? I like you and I'd like to get to know you better." -- was creepy? And someone said no to you just because you asked that instead of....?

Per your first paragraph, I personally don't think that knowing someone IDs as queer often tells us anything about if they'd possibly like us back. That's mostly because that's just one of about a gazillion factors in whether or not we have interest in someone, you know? In other words, on par with say, someone who likes someone and finds out they're single versus in a relationship.

I think if she's someone you want to come out to, period, there's certainly nothing wrong with that. I just think that if the motivation for that is some sort of overture, or kind of passive way to express interest in her, it probably won't accomplish that. (And too, someone has to ask someone out eventually, you know? It's either her or you, so it's not like either of you could wind up getting involved without *someone* being direct and active.)

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Burdened with glorious booty
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Erm, not quite. This guy in my high school was uber popular, and because of that he was always SURROUNDED by other popular people (me being on of the socially awkward librarian kids). So I kind of took advantage of almost every opportunity I had to talk to him, because otherwise I never would have talked to him at all. That's all it was - talking. But when I sent him a valentine, he never responded, and rumours started to spread that I was a creepy stalker because I was talking to him so much. I've had that a few times, actually - I've been "friendzoned" (I hate that term, by the way, but it's the closest thing I've got) by close friends who I've fancied, and they often do this by ignoring me entirely when I ask them out. Like, they never respond and pretend I never said anything. So in my experience, being active and direct and anything other than subtle is a bad thing that never works.

Here's the thing, what's the difference between asking someone out for coffee so you can get to know them better and hanging out as friends? Because I've been out with her as a friend, kind of (I'm still new to the town and I don't know my way around still, so she walked to town with me and helped me find the local Tesco's). Is there a difference? All the times I've expressed an interest, it's been an explicit "I have romantic feelings for you - what would you want to do about that?" kind of message, probably because I get slightly confused if people are more subtle than that towards me. I've hung out with friends one-on-one before, so I'd like to know what separates that from a date.

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Heather
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You know, if you have found that a more subtle or passive approach works better for you...well, I'm not the expert on what works best for you. So, if that has, and you feel better about that, then by all means, do that.

Ultimately, I'm not sure there often is a difference in the ask, btw, about asking someone to hang out as friends and asking because you've a romantic interest. I'd say that it's on that hangout that you'd take the opportunity to express interest in dating. Know what I mean?

I'd also remind you -- or anyone -- that in my opinion, dating, and even asking folks out, is a whole lot like playing baseball. A home run isn't only something we're not going to hit every time we're at bat, it's going to be rare. We're going to have plenty of missed balls, foul balls, and only getting to firsts that happen in the process. It's not like most people get a yes to everyone they ask, or even get a response, nor that everyone we ask is going to share the romantic interest we feel.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Funnily enough, actually chatting to her and some of our fellow Pole Fitness friends, she mentioned that part of the reason she wears her "dyke" necklace is "for advertisement reasons," and that she's "gotten more laughs from it than women." So she at least thinks that letting people know that she's a lesbian is a good way of getting possible attention from ladies.

She's indicated that she's single and on the lookout, though, so I'm not sure that any attempt at asking her out would go as disastrously as I've been fearing. I'm not sure that she'd reject me entirely if I asked her out, but again, I think I need more time to find out.

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Ta-da!

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Robin Lee
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What else do you need from her to feel more secure about asking her out? IN other words, having someone be your friend and dating them are often different things, so I'm wondering what more you think you can learn from her as a friend and acquaintance that will make you feel like it's okay to ask her out?

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Robin

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Getting the impression that she's interested in me in the same way, I guess. Although she could be trying to communicate that and I'm just not seeing it, I'm really bad at these things. The only time I was successful in asking someone out, it was with my ex, and the only reason I was comfortable doing that was because he was a close friend who wasn't very subtle about the fact that he'd had on-off romantic feelings for me for YEARS - I was okay asking him, because I knew the answer would be yes. I have no idea what her answer would be. I'm hoping that if she DOES reject me, then she won't be a git about it.

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copper86
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Hello, Derpy Hooves,

I hope it's okay if I chime in here. I know exactly what you mean about picking up on any signals from people you're interested - be they friendship signals or romantic cues - and trying to decide on how "safe" it would be to ask them out. Asking someone out is a big deal for me - I have to figure out "what to say" and when to do it - but I admit that when I myself get asked out, I get pretty nervous and flustered!

You've stated that this girl is very nice and compassionate, so it sounds like if you were to ask her out, if she did say no, she would do so in a gentle and caring way. What I always think about when it comes to asking friends out is if the friendship and the person are both positive and caring, then asking them out shouldn't hurt anything to the extreme. Yes, if she says no things might be a bit uncomfortable for a bit (that has happened to me!), but if you are both invested in the friendship, that interim will eventually disappear and you will be friends.

This is in no way saying that I think she will say no - I'm just saying that it sounds like she would say it in a gentle way. You never know until you try! She does sound sweet and fun to be with! I understand that you felt a lot safer asking your ex out... How did that go with reference to what you said? What did he say? Where did you do it and what time of day was it? I'm not saying that she will respond the same way if you repeat this pattern, but if you maybe ask her out (if you decide to) in a somewhat similar manner (picking a time of day that's good for you, saying something that makes you feel honest), you might feel a bit better.

I know this is a confusing time, but I'm sure you will figure things out in time! Take care!

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"I do the best that I can. I'm just what I am." - Rush (Best I Can)

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The difference between this girl and my ex is that with this girl, I want to subtly imply that I'm interested first before I do any direct asking out - that way, if she's not cool with me being interested, she'd have picked up on the subtle bits beforehand and made some kind of mini-rejection so I know not to ask her, OR she responds to it positively and I feel more confident asking her out. Either way, I could see it as beneficial...but aside from flirting (which I have NO IDEA how to do at all, and asking friends hasn't helped me either), I have no idea how to go about being subtle.

With my ex, we'd already had this on-off thing going on over a very long period of time (he's a long-distance friend, and our relationship was long distance too), but on my end I thought there were too many things stopping me from just asking him out and being his girlfriend (some of my friends didn't like him for reasons that would take far too much time to explain). The reason I was able to ask him out was because I'd really thought it over long and hard, and I realised that actually, it was my life and I wanted to do something about this for my own sake (We'd organised a general meet-up for that week, anyway, so that became our first date). I just sent him a massive online letter telling him how I felt and how I wanted to be his girlfriend.

I was able to be direct like that because I would have been VERY surprised if he'd have said no. With this girl, I have no idea what the reaction would be, and I'd like to gauge it first before I do anything because I'm so used to being turned down that I'd like to avoid it if I can.

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Ta-da!

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Jacob at Scarleteen
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Hey Derpy!

I was thinking that a long letter expressing all your intentions is a different kind of 'direct'.
You can say smaller things quite directly, like that you like her, you appreciate her, you enjoy spending time with her, you'd like to go to x,y or z place with her. It can be something of a big step to go all the way to full-on coupledom from nada but asking to spend some more time with someone, or even saying you're into them thankfully doesn't take that much of a gesture every time...

It's worth thinking that this is a relationship already. To be able to say you like her is analogous to many other ways you may want to let a friend or partner know about your feelings and trying to change the relationship in ways that can accommodate those feelings. Starting this means more communication. That's how we can have fun and pleasure in our relationships, by seeking out fun and pleasure with the people with us, which often means letting them in on that intent.

Another option is that you just don't feel ready to pursue this right now. It's not compulsary! All of this should be about your happiness in your life and friendships and sex life, so this should feel good.

It seems like you're into her, and if she's cool then telling her you're interested in testing your compatibility for more intimacy shouldn't be as bad as it seems. It's something you can put behind you quite quickly especially if you do want to continue a friendship if it is a no, and you give her that option (people can have a habit of not making that clear when they ask someone out... it's like "LOVE ME OR I'LL DIE AND OUR FRIENDSHIP WILL BE OVER" - don't do that). But not feeling ready for that is fine and just leaving it for now is cool too, especially if it takes the pressure off.

So yeah my summary is:

1/What about being direct but taking small steps?
2/Communication is going to remain important for any fun you're going to be having with her no matter what, so if you DO feel ready to change things between you then communicating that is good practice!
3/You don't have to be doing it if you don't feel ready. So if you do it, do it for fun, not because of the pressure.

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Burdened with glorious booty
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Having seen a Neil Gaiman twitter post about "How to seduce a writer", I've decided to write her a note with the following message: "Dear S, You are invited to a seduction: Please come to dinner on Monday night. Wear the kind of clothes you would like to be seduced in. RSVP for details." It's really silly, but it gets the message across. I won't give it to her now, but I'll break it out when I feel it's appropriate.

I'm actually kind of happy that at least one person has actually told me "Ask her out when you feel comfortable with it" - most of the friends who I've asked for advice have told me that I should ask her out OMG RIGHT NOW because otherwise I'll "miss my chance" or something.

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Heather
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Hey Derpy?

I don't mean to second-guess you, and I can't speak for everyone. But you were concerned about coming across to someone as...well, too-too when you originally asked about this, so I thought I'd pitch in.

A seduction is a highly sexual invitation (seduction is a word that is absolutely about sex: more to the point, it means a sexual enticement). And I think it's safe to say that most people will take that term literally, so inviting someone to sex, even down to telling them to get dressed for it is, IMO, a VERY forward thing to do, to the point that I'd say if we weren't very certain someone wanted to be sexual with us, that would most likely make the recipient feel pretty darn uncomfortable or really put off. I'm a pretty forward person myself, and am not made uncomfortable by much, but I have to say that if I got that from someone who I hadn't expressed any romantic or sexual interest in, and who hadn't expressed any in me, it'd be way more likely that something like that would give me the creeps than feel silly.

I missed a couple days in here, so maybe I missed how we got from maybe asking this girl out or telling her you felt interested in her romantically to inviting her into something highly sexual?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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It comes from a joke on Neil Gaiman's tumblr about how to flirt with a writer, and he was saying that if you want to ask out a writer, then you have to spell it out for them (because writers are very good with internal thoughts and imaginary people, but not so good at what's going on outside) - the "letter" that I wrote above was his suggestion for a "cheerful note" that you should send a writer, should you want to date them. I could replace it with a different word - I didn't really think it over too much, I guess. I've not given it to her, so I can always reword it. I just thought that it was something silly and light-hearted that would make it easier for me to send it to her, because the point is, who even talks like that, or sends notes like that? Plus, she could have understood the reference. I just thought she'd get a laugh from it. Honestly, it was meant to be a joke. This is another problem with me, I guess - when I'm trying to joke around, people seem to take me seriously and not realise I'm joking. Yeah, it might not be a good idea to say it with that exact wording...but something funny or silly would still work, perhaps?

There've been so many times where I COULD have told her, but I haven't because the situation wasn't right. She was saying this evening about how she's clearly not going to get a girlfriend any time soon because no one's liked her yet. And when I've said "Aww, but girls DO like you!", she's just been like "Bullshit, if they did then they'd have said so by now." And every time, it crosses my mind to say "But I like you"...but I don't say it. I don't say it, because it's never the right time or place. I just want to be able to say it, and say it soon, but I'm really struggling with this and no one seems willing or able to help me.

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Ta-da!

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Karybu
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Seduction is a pretty strong term with a very specific meaning, as Heather pointed out, and if you knew for sure that she was aware of that particular reference it would probably be okay, but not knowing that? A note like that could very well come across as just being too much, if you know what I mean, especially since you haven't actually expressed any romantic or sexual interest in her as of yet. Something funny or silly could definitely work, I agree with you there, but I think the wording needs some adjustment.

I'm sorry you're struggling with letting her know how you feel - you're definitely not alone in that. Perhaps one way to think about it that might help is to recognize that there really is no such thing as "the perfect moment" or "the right situation". (There are times that are better than others, for sure, but if you're waiting for the absolute perfect time, you'll be waiting forever.)

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Yeah, if I do decide to send her a joking note, then the wording won't be so strong. It's an example of the kind of method I mean, though, I guess. At this point, though, I'm starting to think that I'm running out of options, and that I'm just going to do what I've always done - ask her directly to her face, only to get rejected. That's ALWAYS what's happened, and while I don't want that to happen again, I feel like it's my only choice.

It's not even a case of "the perfect moment" - what could have been an okay moment to chip in with that was when we were trying to get drinks at a bar and in the queue for a club, respectively. That's just NOT ideal, I don't think. The fact that I've been able to tell her some of the things about myself that I've told her - the fact that I have aspergers, the fact that I'm demisexual and even the fact that I'm a 1 or a 2 on the kinsey scale...that shows how much I trust her with things, and the fact that she's accepted literally all of it is pretty awesome. But I just don't know how to approach the rest of it.

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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Well, I don't know about you, but my experience is that if I walk into something certain the outcome will be negative, it usually is.

Honestly, besides being REALLY passive, or REALLY pushy, I just don't think there's a right or wrong way to do this that will guarantee you get what you want. I think that what she wants -- right now, before you say anything -- is most likely to influence what she says when you ask her out, not how you ask. And no matter how you do or don't ask, that's simply something you can't control.

So, I'd just check in with yourself about if you feel up to this part of dating: it always does involve being prepared to deal with disinterest or rejection, and there's just no getting around those things as possibilities.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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I guess I just feel like her rejecting me would hurt a lot more than any other times I've been rejected - firstly, because it would have been the first time I'd admitted to liking another girl, and secondly...aside from general disinterest, I can't see any reason why she wouldn't want to go out with me. She's looking for a relationship of some kind, I've admitted to her that I can like girl, we're becoming great friends...so it'd hurt more if she said "Sorry, but I'm not interested in you." Because that says to me "While I'm on the lookout for a girl, you're not what I'm looking for." I don't know.

Having spent the evening out with her yesterday (going "to da club" with our Pole Fitness society), I can also discern a few more things: firstly, she's massively okay with me being demisexual and having aspergers (even pointing out that, since mine it "easy to hide", it's kinda cool that I'm talking to her about it). Secondly, she finds me attractive to some degree, although I'm not sure if she was joking - I showed her a picture of me wearing this old goth dress that I'd told her about (I have to sell it because it's too big for me now), and she started saying (yelling) "JESUS, GIRL, You've got a FIGURE under there! Oh my God - take the picture away, it's turning me on too much!" (which struck me as funny for a multitude of reasons). Thirdly, while she doesn't like casual sex, she wants at least some emotional involvement with the people she has sex with...and while I know she's looking for sex, I don't know if she's looking for a full-on relationship. So taking these factors into account...I'm still a bit confused.

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Ta-da!

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Robin Lee
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HI Derpy Hooves,

Reading this, what i'm left wondering is whether it is more uncomfortable for you to not share your feelings with her, or whether it's more uncomfortable to risk that painful rejection.

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Robin

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A bit of both, I think. I don't want to keep lying to her, especially since she's been so honest about herself with me (her honesty is something I really like and admire about her, too) - plus, I don't want to keep dragging this out. On the other hand, I'm pretty nervous and upset over the idea of her turning me down, or even wanting vastly different things out of a relationship than I would, due to her being so sexual (I mean, I COULD be attracted to her, but not right now). So yeah, a bit of both.

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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You know, one thing I think it might help to know is that often, the dynamics of friendship don't tend to change as much between women when they've had some kind of sexual or romantic relationship or interchange as they can tend to with opposite-sex dynamics.

That likely has a lot less to do with biology than it does with queer community dynamics, and certainly, that's not always the case, but it often is.

In other words, even if you put this out there and either she's not feeling it, or it turns out you two want very different things, the chances of this going right back to the kind of friendship you've been building are awfully good.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Burdened with glorious booty
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Well, if she does reject me, then that's generally the reaction I'm hoping to get.

I think I'm pretty much going to word it that while she obviously doesn't HAVE to go out with me or even acknowledge that I feel that way about her, if she ever reciprocates or wants to try dating me then that'd be awesome. It's not the end of the world if she doesn't want to go out with me, but it's still an offer I'm willing to make. I think I want to stress how it's really not a big deal if it's not what she wants - I was able to do that last time I got rejected by a friend, and while it still stung, I was better able to just keep it to myself and go "fair enough, I'm perfectly content with our friendship."

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Heather
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I think you can probably just stick with, "if she wants to try dating me then that'd be awesome." And maybe an "If not, that's okay, too, and I'd like to continue to be friends." Simple. Clear. No big whoop. I think you're overthinking this, IMO.

When you don't want to front-load something with pressure for someone, then you want to keep it simple. You ask her out in one way or another, simply. She already knows she gets to say yes, no or maybe. You don't need to give her that permission: asking a question automatically gives her that.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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I know I probably am overthinking this, but then, I've always overthought EVERYTHING. It's both why I'm so weird, why I'm pretty good at literature-related things, and why I worry so much about things like this. It's my strength and weakness.

I've put the whole thing aside for the time being, since we both have essays to do and since my friend gave me nits, I've been trying to avoid people as much as possible so I don't give it to anyone else (it's okay, I've had a good go with a nit-comb and I've put some stuff in my hair tonight, so it should be clear by tomorrow).

I HAVE, however, organised with her a trip to town after our essays are done as a way of celebrating (not sure what day we'd do this, though), and I was intending to tell her how I felt then. Being as casual as possible about it, just coming out with it and hoping she takes it well. So that's a plan, at least.

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Ta-da!

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Robin Lee
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Sometimes we overthinkers just have to consciously decide at some times that we're just not going to overthink something. [Smile]

Best of luck with the essays and enjoy the outing with your friend, no matter how it turns out

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Robin

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WesLuck
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All the best! Focusing on the positive very often makes more positive things happen. [Smile]
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Thank you. [Big Grin]

My essay went fine, and I've arranged to go to town with her tomorrow after pole fitness, so yeah, I'll do my best.

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Ta-da!

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Burdened with glorious booty
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I did it. Today, after pole, I gave her a letter explaining how I felt about her. She hasn't responded, but I have a feeling that might have been because I was a total idiot and mentioned in there that I want to stay friends with her and if she wants to ignore it then she can (although I also mentioned being interested in hearing back from her, so I don't know). I don't know what's going to happen now, but hey, at least I said something.

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Ta-da!

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Robin Lee
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Absolutely! We can never predict what someone else is going to do, but you did something you were scared of doing, so go you!

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Robin

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smittenkitten
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It is my experience that when we feel strongly about someone and let that feeling fester (for want of a better word), it is usually cathartic when we finally tell them how we feel, no matter the outcome. I hope things turn out for you, but if not you've still overcome your fear and should be proud [Smile]

Cheers,

Marion

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I honestly don't know what to do now, though.

I could have seen her today - we share a lecture today, so it's not like we could have talked at all. But I still sat right near the front and did my best to avoid her.

I'm just so scared of seeing her again, because you know what, if she liked me back then she would have texted me with a response. She would have come forward and said "Yeah, I like you too, let's date." Instead, I've gotten nothing so far, and I know that when I see her it's going to be "Sorry, but...". I just know it, and that's what gets me - just knowing that, yet again, the person I like just doesn't like me back.

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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I'm not sure we can predict how and when she would or will respond quite so easily.

That said, do you want to talk through your what-if here? After all, for sure it's always really disappointing when someone doesn't share the same feelings we have for them, and it's something I think is safe to say will happen to most of us quite a lot in our lives. So, learning how to deal is a useful thing no matter what.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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I'm fairly used to this particular "what if" by now, really. I'm used to people actually ignoring when I've asked them out, so for her to not say anything (so far, of course - she might be waiting for when I next get a good chance to see her, which is Friday)...yeah, I'm sadly not too surprised. Disappointed, if she is doing that, because I wouldn't have thought her the type.

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Ta-da!

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Heather
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Really, I wouldn't attach anything to her non-response just yet. Not only because everyone isn't the same with this stuff, but because there are also more factors than if this person feels the same way about you or not. For instance, I don't know what that letter even said, and how involved it was, so am not sure what she'd be responding to, you know?

But all the same, I asked about coping because you expressed feeling scared of seeing her, and some other things that didn't sound like you actually felt okay and up to coping with this without it being a big deal.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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